YOU ARE THE ADVICE COLUMNIST: Should I Ask Him To Be My FWB?

I've never had a FWB-type situation before, so this is a new experience for me. Should I ask him if he's interested in giving this a shot? If so, how?

Sep 25, 2013 at 6:30pm | Leave a comment

image
I recently got out of a brief but very emotionally intense relationship. In the time-honored tradition of getting over somebody by getting under somebody else, I'm thinking about asking an acquaintance if he's interested in becoming friends with benefits. I'm feeling pretty sure that I don't want to be in another intense romantic relationship right now, but I do miss having sex and I feel safer hooking up with somebody I know than a stranger from a bar or Craigslist. 
We have some mutual friends and see each other once a month or so at parties or events, but I don't know him well. I do know that he is from a conservative religious background but is no longer religious (like me), and that he's at least somewhat sexually adventurous; I've heard him talking about visiting sex shops and a nudist colony. I know he's single, but I don't know if he's doing any dating or actively looking for a relationship. I am hesitant because I don't want to make him feel used or taken advantage of. Also, while I'm attracted to him physically, I think his personality is kind of boring and I'm pretty sure that I would never be interested in a serious long-term relationship with him. 
A few other relevant details: we live in a small town and have overlapping social circles, so things could get slightly awkward if he's not interested or if we give it a try and things don't work out. Also, I'm leaving in about 3 months to go work abroad for a year, so this arrangement would have a built-in end date. 
I've never had a FWB-type situation before, so this is a new experience for me. Should I ask him if he's interested in giving this a shot? If so, how?

 

Send us your deepest questions! Advice@xoJane.com !!