YOU ARE THE ADVICE COLUMNIST: How Do We Tell My Unstable Roommate That We Don't Want To Live With Her?

We don't know how to tell her we don't want to live with her again because we know her reaction will be emotional, traumatic, and potentially dangerous.

Dec 12, 2013 at 6:30pm | Leave a comment

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My friend and I moved in with a girl we did not know very well in August for a year long lease. We hung out multiple times before moving in together and she is nothing like the impression we got from her.
She is extremely messy and disorganized and our common areas are constantly a mess. We also have to hound her for money she owes on bills every month. 
It wouldn't be so bad if we were able to simply address those issues and move on. 
Me and the other roommate are legitimately scared to talk to her about these things because of her mental instability.  She cannot deal with criticism- anytime she is reprimanded at work or feels judged by her family, she gets super drunk and cries to us, locks herself in her room, self harms and takes photos of it and posts it on social media, etc. We have called the police one time already when she was showing signs of being suicidal. She has also tried to end her lease with us unofficially by leaving with no warning, simply leaving a few valuable things for us to sell to cover her costs. She came back and apologized. She is aware that she most likely has a mood disorder yet refuses to do anything about it. It is quite a bit of unexpected drama and is stressful for us. 
Our problem is that we don't know how to tell her we don't want to live with her again because we know her reaction will be emotional, traumatic, and potentially dangerous. She has made it clear that she wants to re-lease and live with us again because she considers us her friends at this point even though we are not much more than politely friendly and concerned about her. 
Please help! 

How can she deal with her unstable roommate without potentially harming her? Let her know in the comments!

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