Amy Schumer Breaks The P-Word Wall On Comedy Central

Also: net neutrality, a catastrophic celebrity social media fail, and your cat is not that different from a tiger.
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Amanda Lauren
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Also: net neutrality, a catastrophic celebrity social media fail, and your cat is not that different from a tiger.

Most of the time, the news is irrelevant. Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh, but unless it’s local, most news and laws probably won’t affect our daily lives. But, today I have an update on net neutrality, which will affect everyone here forever because we all use the Internet. The President has let the FCC know where he stands, and I’ve got the details for you.

I also have information of perhaps one of the worst social media fails in history by an ’80s TV dad (no, it's not Bob Saget or the dad from "Small Wonder"). Plus, some info on the word pussy and a study about well….pussycats. Oh, and good news for dyslexics and bad news for corn mazes.

What do you think about net neutrality? Could this benefit us in some way or only end up being a big win for large ISPs (who probably won’t give us better customer service anyway)? Tweet me @AmandaLauren (or follow me, I promise I won’t bite) or chat away in the comments.

Obama Isn’t Neutral On Net Neutrality

Net neutrality has been a big topic in 2014. Now the President has weighed in and he’s all for it. So, what exactly is net neutrality? As you read this, the net is neutral, but if net neutrality isn’t protected, companies could pay ISPs for a “fast lane” so their sites can load faster, which may sound like a good idea (who wouldn’t raise their hand when asked if they want their websites to load faster?), but poses a problem because sites who don’t want to cough up the cash could potentially move slower than the line at Best Buy on Black Friday. 

Major players such as Google and Netflix are for net neutrality. So, who’s against it? Internet service providers (okay, that was a given) including AT&T, Verizon and Comcast, as well as some other organizations including the National Cable and Telecommunications Association and the National Music Publishers Association. It’s pretty simple why they are against it -- if net neutrality isn’t protected, “Big Telecommunication” has an additional stream of revenue.

On Monday, President Obama posted an open letter and video to the FCC, asking them to reclassify the Internet as a public utility, like gas and electricity. He wants “a free and open Internet.” In the letter, he said,

I made clear my commitment to a free and open Internet, and my commitment remains as strong as ever. Four years ago, the FCC tried to implement rules that would protect net neutrality with little to no impact on the telecommunications companies that make important investments in our economy. After the rules were challenged, the court reviewing the rules agreed with the FCC that net neutrality was essential for preserving an environment that encourages new investment in the network, new online services and content, and everything else that makes up the Internet as we now know it. Unfortunately, the court ultimately struck down the rules — not because it disagreed with the need to protect net neutrality, but because it believed the FCC had taken the wrong legal approach.

But this issue isn’t something the President and can just sign on the dotted line and take care of; the FCC is actually an independent agency. Obama has suggested a four-point plan:

No blocking. If a consumer requests access to a website or service, and the content is legal, your ISP should not be permitted to block it. That way, every player — not just those commercially affiliated with an ISP — gets a fair shot at your business.

No throttling. Nor should ISPs be able to intentionally slow down some content or speed up others — through a process often called “throttling” — based on the type of service or your ISP’s preferences.

Increased transparency. The connection between consumers and ISPs — the so-called “last mile” — is not the only place some sites might get special treatment. So, I am also asking the FCC to make full use of the transparency authorities the court recently upheld, and if necessary to apply net neutrality rules to points of interconnection between the ISP and the rest of the Internet.

No paid prioritization. Simply put: No service should be stuck in a “slow lane” because it does not pay a fee. That kind of gatekeeping would undermine the level playing field essential to the Internet’s growth. So, as I have before, I am asking for an explicit ban on paid prioritization and any other restriction that has a similar effect.

Comedy Central Execs Are No Longer Coy About The Word Pussy

We all know some words and phrases are banned on basic cable and certain networks, but now, you can hear the word pussy uncensored on Comedy Central. How did this all come about? "Inside Amy Schumer" executive producer Dan Powell thought it was unfair that the network’s standards allowed the word dick to be said uncensored, but not the corresponding term for the alternate anatomy.

Powell wrote a letter and eventually had a conference call with the higher-ups at the network, who ultimately said "yes" to pussy. No word on whether Powell was going to call his bosses dicks if they wouldn’t agree to stop censoring pussy.

So, in what fellow executive producer and head writer Jessi Klein called “a great moment in U.S. history,” Amy Schumer first uttered the word pussy uncensored in a sketch called “Acting Off-Camera,” in the sentence, “My character has a pussy.” Indeed, she does….

Perhaps The Worst Social Media Fail By a Celebrity Ever

On Monday, Bill Cosby posted a picture of himself on Twitter and asked the public to meme him. They did not respond in the way Cosby probably had anticipated --

Hello my name is Bill Cosby. I am the star of the classic 90’s comedy Ghost Dad. Also I am a serial rapist. -@FilmCow

It’s not rape if you’re famous. - @pete_forester

Define ‘drugged’- ‪@rustymk2

My social media manager did what?- @AdamHammer

Recently, a whole lot of news has come out about the comedian being a serial rapist who paid off his victims in exchange for their silence.

In an interview with The Daily Mail, actress Barbara Bowman revealed that she wanted to come out with her harrowing story in hopes other victims would come forward:

I never took shut up money. My motivation to speak now is to expose Bill Cosby as the animal that he is. He went after me in that hotel room like an animal with such sexual prowess and force that he couldn't control himself. And at 19 years old, I knew it would be the last time he would ever get the chance to hurt me this way again.

I was drugged and raped by that man. He is a monster. He came at me like a monster. My hope is that others who have experienced sexual abuse will not be intimidated into silence by the famous, rich and powerful. If I can help one victim, then I've done my job.

Last month, as a result of this interview, Queen Latifah cancelled Cosby as a guest on her talk show. Then, comedian Hannibal Buress talked about Cosby in his act saying,

Google ‘Bill Cosby, rape,'” and [you’ll get] more results than ‘Hannibal Buress.’

While Cosby has not commented as of Tuesday afternoon, it’s safe to say there’s an opening on his team for a new social media manager.

Captain of Capsized Ferry in South Korea Gets 36 Years

Back in April, as a ferry in South Korea capsized, the captain, Lee Joon-seok, leapt to safety, leaving 300 passengers to die. 250 of those passengers were teenagers on a school field trip. While prosecutors sought the death penalty, Lee was acquitted of murder and charged with violating “seaman’s law.”

Lee acknowledged to the court that he was not steering the ship when the trouble began. He apologized admitting,

I failed to take the necessary measures for passengers to leave the ship. I reflect and apologize to the victim's families -- to those who lost their beloved sons and daughters. To the fathers, I'd say: 'I've committed a sin, worthy of death.'

Fourteen other crewmembers received various sentences from 5 to 30 years.

Headlines

· Christian Boer, a dyslexic graphic designer, has created a font designed to make reading less difficult. Boer explained the need for the product, which is now available to download for free: “Traditional fonts have characteristics that make characters difficult to recognize for people with dyslexia. Oftentimes, the letters of a word are confused, turned around or jumbled up because they look too similar.”

· A recent study says that despite years of domestication, housecats really aren’t that different from feral felines. One of the study’s authors said, “[house cats are] only semi-domesticated. We believe we have created the first preliminary evidence that depicts domestic cats as not that far removed from wildcat populations.”

· According to Modern Farmer, there has been a recent spike of 911 calls from frustrated people who can’t find their way out of The Cool Patch Pumpkins maze near Sacramento, California, which happens to be the largest corn maze in the world according to “The Guinness Book of World Records.” The maze’s website correctly states, “Our new design for 2014 will have you turning in circles providing hours of fun as you pit your wits against our most clever design ever.”