WHAT TO WEAR TO THE BALLGAME: Seriously Adorable MLB Gear for Fancy Fan Girls

How to be the fanciest bitch at the ballpark.

Jul 20, 2012 at 4:00pm | Leave a comment

 

I really love baseball. I dislike almost all other sports -- I loathe football, I don't understand soccer, and basketball is totally boring to me. I played baseball as a kid until the boys I played with got too old and aggressive, and then I was demoted to softball. My mother worried I'd end up like Marsha in the episode of "The Brady Bunch" where she gets beaned in the face with a ball.

I live walking distance from Dodger Stadium here in Los Angeles. I was never a Dodger fan before moving over here, but I sure am now. You can’t live 5 minutes from a major sports team venue and be a hater. Believe me, I tried. Now I'm a season ticket holder.

Really, I'm a Texas Rangers fan, and I root for the Detroit Tigers on occasion because of my dude. I’ll go to just about any baseball game at any ballpark in a city I happen to be visiting, except for the New York Yankees. I’d rather root for cancer than root for the Yanks.

I am always at a loss as to what to wear to games, as it is not my nature to be a super casual dresser. I don’t ever like to be seen in public wearing just a T-shirt and jeans! We always make an evening out of it and go to a nice dinner before or after. Then I wind up being the girl in a fancy restaurant wearing a T-shirt.  

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That's a striped dress that I'm wearing.

I usually settle for wearing something cute that is at least in the team’s colors, and carrying my ball cap or foam finger with me to the park. Mind you, I never really wear the hat, as I don't want to mess up my hair.

I was at Dodger stadium earlier this week and the game was uneventful, so I wandered into the team store. For years, team logo gear aimed at women has been stuck in the 90s, when the baby doll tee was king. Either that, or it was the same guy's designs, just shrunken down and rendered in pastel pink. So I was pleasantly surprised by just how much great stuff there actually is out there for ladies right now! I realize I could have helpfully told you about this at the beginning of baseball season, but there's still a lot of baseball left, ladies.

The cornerstone of team gear will always be the T-shirt. And it pains me greatly to admit that my favorite ones are currently made by Victoria's Secret PINK. That giant "PINK" they plaster on everything makes me instantly think of vaginas or buttholes. But it's hard to deny the cuteness of these particular tees:

I love the distinct 70s vibe to these. One of my favorite movies is the original "Bad News Bears," so I am instantly drawn to anything with a nod toward retro style.

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Morris Buttermaker is drinking a Budweiser here, but this movie made me a Schlitz fan for life.

I don't even like it when players wear long pants. In my opinion it should always be knee high pants and stirrups over your socks.

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Baseball's all-time hit leader, Pete Rose.

Looking at this picture of Pete Rose makes my blood boil, as he is banned from the Baseball Hall of Fame for life for betting on baseball. Yet known steroid users like Barry Bonds and Roger Clemens are free to be inducted? Sure, Clemens was cleared of lying to Congress about steroids, but we all know he used them. Pete is clearly just a lifetime degenerate gambler who hurt nobody but himself.

The Victoria's Secret PINK line has versions of their retro-inspired tees for almost every team. They also have some really dumb ones that say stuff like "Bleacher Babe" or "Talent Scout" and my least favorite, "Let's Kiss For the KISS CAM!" Yes, you're right -- I'm like, totally only here at the game to look for cute boys and make it onto the Kiss Cam.

Another line that is making some cute throwback tees is Forty Seven Brand. Vintage sports team logos are always so much better than current attempts at "modernization." 

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Left, White Sox tee, $40.00.  Right, Boston Red Sox tee, $45.00.  Both, 47Brand.com.

While these T-shirts are among the cutest available styles, they are still just T-shirts. You still have the problem of looking typical when you pair them with jeans or shorts. I always wear my team tees to the ballpark with a cute, flirty skirt.

I happen to think that leopard and other zany prints are neutrals, and therefore go with anything.

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Clockwise from top left: Black knee length puffy skirt, $22.37.  Blue leopard tiered skirt, $89.00.  Elastic leopard skirt, $38.99.  Bright blue a-line skirt, $200.00.

A crazy skirt is the perfect foil to a casual t-shirt. Switching your jeans for a polished mini amps up the style quotient of your outfit instantly. Plus, it's pretty amazing to be at the game in an easy-breezy skirt on days when it's almost 100 degrees out.

Another way to be the fanciest bitch at the ballpark is to re-consider your footwear:

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Clockwise from top left: Custom painted TOMS, any team, $100.00.  Custom embellished wedges, any team, $200.00. Swarovski crystal Converse, any team, $125.00.  Custom embellished spike heels, any team, $180.00.

I might wear heels or wedges to the game if I was spending it in a luxury box or having dinner in one of the ritzy clubs they have at some parks. But if I am hitting the game in my usual style, which is to walk to 1/2 mile from my house so as to avoid paying for parking, I'd for sure be in the jeweled Converse or hand-painted TOMS.

I'm having a hard time convincing myself that I don't need ALL of this team jewelry:

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Left, Detroit Tigers "D", $174.99.  Right: Texas Rangers charm, $39.99.

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Top: Oakland A's nameplate charm, $44.99.  Bottom: Seattle Mariners bracelet, $54.99.

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Top: Cincinnati Reds toe ring, $39.99.  Bottom: Texas Rangers charm bangle, $34.99.

I'm definitely working on bringing back the toe ring. If Cat could resurrect the scrunchie, certainly the lowly toe ring could have another moment in the sun.

Carrying a logo bag is an entertaining way to show your team some love without plastering it all over your body:

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Left: Clear Dodgers tote, $17.99.  Right: Cubs bowling bag purse, $29.99.

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Left: Cubs striped purse, $12.99.  Right: Pirates striped purse, $12.99.

A hair accessory can become the focal point of an outfit when paired with a simple sundress or casual outfit. This team logo headband does double duty -- it keeps your hair off your face while providing a splash of team spirit to even the most basic ensemble.

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MLB Team headbands, $9.99 each.

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Left: Clip-in hair extension, $12.99.  Right: Clip with feathers for hair, $9.99.

You could also wear some fake hair or the old classic, a roach clip with feathers. The idea is to be able to wear your regular non-logo laden clothes, but still be representin' who you're rooting for. There are so many baseball games in the season, if I had to rely solely on my meager stockpile of team specific T-shirts for what to wear to every game, I'd be doing laundry every other day.  

The big bummer at Dodger Stadium is that they don't have a face painting station like they do at other ballparks! I have the un-steady hands of Charles Bukowski on day 4 of the DTs, or I'd buy one of these kits and do it myself:

The thing to remember with any team gear is that a little bit goes a long way. One logo-plastered item is enough for any outfit. Everything in moderation, I say, unless it's peanuts and Crackerjacks.

XO,

Alison

Twitter: @IveyAlison