It's Valentine's Day So I Decided To Go Traditional With Lip Injections

Chocolate? Roses? Hell, no. I got me some LIPS.

Feb 14, 2013 at 11:00am | Leave a comment

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Kisses.

Yes, I know, I know. Lip injections = clown face. Porno lips. Mistake.

But not if done right.

Or so I thought when I watched this video featuring my favorite dermatologist Dr. David Colbert demonstrating what he calls "the Colbert lip" on CBS News and going through an explanation of why and when it works: symmetry, appropriate dimensions (the lower lip always fuller than the top), and using modern methods of substances found naturally in the body, including the hyaluronic-acid-based Restylane -- as opposed to old-school silicone.

I asked Dr. Colbert if I could try a complimentary procedure to see how the results looked, so using the same iPhone extended technique I did with my live-Botox video, I captured the before and after magic.

He was right. The effect was natural, pouty and fuller. Dr. Colbert says there is an imitation of the look of "high school lips" where there is the organic plump that comes with a more youthful face. The effect lasts for three months to a year, with an average of five months.

I asked him why exactly this technique works, and he explained, "Hyaluronic acid is a natural clear gel that is a normal component of skin and lips. It is safe, and when injected artfully produces nice contours and mild plumping or volume increase. It is hygroscopic, meaning it naturally draws water to it. That's why it looks so natural."

The main point, he emphasized, is to make sure you go to a doctor who specializes in the technique. That means not letting your Brazilian waxer do your lips or any other discount aesthetician scenario.

Then I asked him what the cost was. $1,200. Which doesn't surprise me considering that I've actually witnessed Adriana Lima and several other Victoria's Secret supermodels in his waiting room before -- I just wish I had their paychecks, too.

Oh, speaking of lips, if you want to see me use mine, I'm performing at Jon Friedman's Rejection Show tonight in Brooklyn. We can air-kiss!

What are you getting yourself for Valentine's Day? Hermes Bag? Leftover ham sandwich stolen from a co-worker in the fridge? Lip injections? Do tell, do tell. My mom got my dog Sam an edible card for Valentine's Day. See?

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Yumyumyumyum.