I'm A Lonely, Insecure Wreck With Really Good Skin

...thanks to this peel-off mask that looks a tad, uh, "Blackface." I'm not gonna pretend it doesn't.

May 27, 2011 at 10:02am | Leave a comment

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I'm a sort of lazy-about-beauty beauty editor. Peep the photo above: Look at those roots! Look at my two week-old chipped manicure (I own no polish remover, to give you an idea of how well I tend to my own nails at home). I barely even blow-dry my hair!

But what I AM ridiculously fastidious about is face masks -- more specifically doing face masks very late at night, alone in my studio apartment with my weird Bambi poster (see it?), a pack of Marlboro Ultra-Lights (yup, deal with it), and a laptop with Photo Booth in lieu of roommates, boyfriends.

Yes, New York City is truly the city that never sleeps! And thus I am living the dream. Staying up all night, most nights!  You know, putting on face masks and isolating miserably and obsessing over creative content and writing incredibly slowly and trying to adjust to being a writer and editor for online when I'm really a huge ADD mess that's going to fail fail fail.

("SOMEONE CALL THE WHAMBULANCE!", one of my friends would interject here, and rightly so. Because I have a sweet gig working with Jane, reviewing beauty products. It rules. But I really AM an ADD mess and also new to writing for online, so sometimes it feels like "Groundhog Day": every day requires new content, I struggle horribly to meet deadlines, I stay up all night to make them, I sleep, I wake up to the same deadlines all over again.)

What I'm getting to -- per usual, you had to read through 300 words of my personal business before you get to the beauty -- is that on all these nights that I'm home alone, working, I do face mask after face mask after face mask.

I have about 15 different ones in circulation -- a job perk!

Here's my thing with face masks: They do work. Masks have really improved the overall prettiness and smoothness of my skin since I started wearing doing them basically daily. Nightly.

Obviously that's a lot of mask time, but then again, after a month of all-nighters and compulsive face-masking, my skin looks less sallow, less dehydrated, less acned and generally healthier. Less "meh."

I'm LOVING this one, the Boscia Luminizing Black Mask. Elephant in the room: Yes, it briefly makes you look like a racist vaudeville performer, but you're not really a racist, so it's okay. Racist readers leave! I don't care if you read my stories.


This all-natural mask is for ALL skin types: it's mineral-rich and meant to boost skin clarity and radiance while refining the look of your pores. That is, when you peel the mask off it pulls the gunk (oil, dirt) from them, making pores LOOK smaller. (For the first time on this site but surely not the last, I tell you: YOU CANNOT SHRINK YOUR PORES; YOU CAN ONLY HELP THEM LOOK SMALLER. The end.)

Anyhow, you slather this stuff on -- and it's inky black, like tar but silky, not sticky -- and wait for about 20 minutes. In this time, the ingredients are gently exfoliating and reducing inflammation. Then the fun part starts: peeling it off! Which, of course, removes dead skin and impurities and excess oil and all that.

You guys, I LIVE for a peel-off, and this bitch did not let  me down. I was so delighted with how beautifully it peeled off and how glowy, taut, clear and good my skin looked underneath that I documented the whole thing:

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Jesus Christ, couldn't I have SMILED for any of these pictures? I took them I guess when I started feeling all lonely and not-amazing. My SKIN, on the other hand -- my SKIN has been amazing. I've used this black mask three nights in a row in my apartment like this, so there you go.

Well ...Ummm, I hope you got something out of this review. Did you? Probably not.

But if you did, tell me. And I know I whined a lot, so you can talk about that. Or face masks you love. Oooh, PLEASE tell me what you think the best masks are?! I REALLY want to try everyone's favorites! Please please!

(P.S. This publicist also sent another new product that compliments 4 AM facials perfectly: Boscia Restorative Treatment for Under-Eye Bags, which is really rich and luxe-feeling; just CRAZY-hydrating, for real.)