The $7 Stupid-Good Hair Treatment You Can Buy Anytime, Anywhere

I've probably bought 30 tubs of this stuff since 2004.
Author:
Publish date:
May 3, 2013
Tags:
Tags:
neutrogena, deep conditioners, drugstore beauty

I was walking with my mom to her hotel last night and couldn't get over how crunchy my ends were feeling. (I'm staying there with her because it has a television. And clean bedding and a predictably temperature-d shower. Oh, and my mom I guess.)

Recall, I spent six hours getting my hair highlighted by the messiah of blondish-chicks-that-decide-to-dye-their-hair-dark-on-a-whim-and-then-freak-and-want-to-go-back, Marko. I'm actually glad I got the dark thing out of my system; I would never advise anyone not to try a different hair color. Life experiences! That's like telling somebody not to take acid; you don't know until you try! Just be honest with yourself: yer hair isn't going to be the same, and also, it might cause dormant schizophrenia to surface.

My hair is actually in great shape, all things considered. During by brief trip to Texas, it was REALLY great. But that's a water-quality thing--step it up, NYC. But for some reason yesterday, my ends felt especially Barbie-like.

Mom is staying pretty close to the xoVain offices, thus pretty close to an enormous drawer-full of hair masks and deep conditioners and treatments and tubes and oils or whatever. I could have gone up and rummaged for something creamy and/or gelatinous to glob on, OR I could stop at any one of the 12 Duane Reades or CVSs we passed going from West Village to Flatiron for a sure thing.

It's been around forever--have you guys tried the Tripe Moisture Mask from Neutrogena?

Ever since finding out that beauty product review sites were a thing, I'll occasionally check up on stuff I like to see what the countless nameless, faceless internet figments have to say about them. Apparently around 4.5 out of 5 of all people on earth lose their tits over this stuff, and I totally get it.

I've been using this since I was a freshman in high school--maybe even before. Believe me when I say that it works better than all but a couple of the high-end masks I've tried. (In fact, I have another great drugstore tip for hair treatments--TO COME! Muahaha.)

Since I was in a balls-to-the-walls mood last night for whatever reason (the audible crunch probably had a lot to do with it), I just coated my entire hair in about half the tub of this stuff and twisted it up in a terribly uncomfortable-to-sleep-in bun thing and went to bed. And when I say went to bed I mean I texted a couple of friends, read product reviews, and Instagrammed until, like, 4 am.

It works beautifully if you leave it in for a few minutes in the shower, too, which is how you're supposed to use it anyway.

I rinsed this morning, and my ends have stopped crunching. My hair feels soft, has nice body, blah blah blah. It actually does what all deep conditioners promise to do.

The cool thing is the price--coming from a girl who doesn't mind spending a stupid amount of money on beauty stuff. Or clothes. Or what did I spend all that money on at Psych Fest...? Really, this should have said "coming from a girl who spends money really stupidly." I would gladly pay tenfold for this stuff.