It's gonna get sappy up in here.
Disclaimer: This is what works for me and my sensitive, dry skin. I'm not saying it will work for you or your mom or your sorority sister or your Auntie Gerald. I'm not a dermatologist. This is what helped me when I started doing it a month ago.
So please don't tell me how you tried it and then all your skin fall off. Or how much you love your skin as is and you're shocked that I'm promoting corporate sponsored self-hate. I don't care if you're #TeamScalySkin. I'm not.
Now on to our featured presentation already in progress:
Me giving good face.
My skin is ridiculously dry. I buy all kinds of potions and lotions and they just sit on top of my skin rather than really penetrating. All the scrubs to exfoliate only make my face feel tight and itchy.
And I JUST discovered that I have sensitive skin, which is why my face feels so janky after I use certain products. For years, I thought that because my skin was dry, it couldn't also be sensitive. Where I got that I don't know. I probably heard it on Oprah.
As always (pre-insurance), I headed to the Internet for answers. Everything on Youtube mentioned Sonic facial brushes. But I couldn't see myself paying $200 for a fancy wash cloth. That's a pair of jeans or shoes! Or um... food for the kid. Whatever. Details.
Jesus must have felt sorry for me, because The Very Next Day, Groupon had a "goods" item called the Prosonic. I Googled it and it's manufactured by the same company that makes Clarisonic Pros. Why the different items? I don't know, but it was on sale for $40 so I didn't ask questions.
I decided to take it all the way back to high school and start using Noxema. One of the Youtube vloggers I stalk raved about her Simple products. They'd just come to the US from the UK and of course, Target had them. I copped the Simple hydrating light moisturizer, Simple Vital Vitamin Night Cream, Simple Cleansing Facial Wipes and Simple Smoothing Face Scrub.
I also got Boots Botanical rosewater facial toner. (I love all things U.K. and when I spent the summer in Scotland, Boots was my favorite. It's like Target with an English accent.)
And now the moment you have all been waiting for, my skin care routine.
I use my Prosonic with Noxema, sweeping over my face for as long as it takes to sing one verse from "SuperBass" (about 60 seconds).
Again with the facial brush, I use Simple Smoothing Face Scrub while I try to memorize a poem.
I pat dry with a towel.
Then Boots Rosewater toner. This part is annoying and I sometimes skip this because who wants to spend years attending to their face? But you shouldn't skip it. You should do it.
If it's day time, I use Simple Hydrating Light Moisturizer. I don't wear much make-up, just Studio Fix when I'm going out, but for the most part, I'm bare skinned.
At night I used Simple Vital Vitamin Night Cream
Bonus: If I'm too tired to do this whole routine, I just wipe my face with Simple Cleansing Facial Wipes and feel clean and refreshed.
I'm telling you, my face feels amazing. I've been using all of this for a month and the difference is just incredible. Not only does my face feel smoother and softer, but the moisturizer is doing its job. It doesn't sit on my skin anymore, it actually sinks in. And just a little dab'll do ya. #OldPersonQuote.
So there you have it. Bassey's Super Awesome Skin Care Routine. You're welcome!