Two Apps to Help You Not Fail as a Human

One is painfully twee, but whatever.
Publish date:
November 14, 2016
hydration, self care, period, apps

Last week I felt like I got scraped off the bottom of someone's boot. I'm sure I'm not alone in that. I was achey, constantly tired, my skin was misbehaving, I totally lost my cold tolerance, and was dealing with migraines almost every night. Somehow, even though I was sending texts every hour to check in on my friends and see how they were doing, I managed to forget about myself.

Which is why I felt like this Kat Kinsman tweet was speaking directly to me:

My mom, when she still thought I wanted to have kids and just needed a little convincing, used to tell me that babies were easy. "If they're crying, they're usually either tired, hungry, or need to be changed. That's it."

I'm, personally, pretty easy (...uh) — either I'm dehydrated, I'm tired, or I'm PMSing.

Right after reading that tweet, I pinched the skin over one of my knuckles. (It's a quick way to see if you're hydrated. If the skin holds its shape and doesn't snap back, you need to drink some water.) While drinking some seltzer, I started looking for hydration reminder apps, because I'm a gross millennial who just loves apps.

The one I've liked the most so far is Plant Nanny. It is so, so, so twee, which is very un-Sagittarius of me, but I'm feeling a little fragile right now, and if I need an app to tell me to drink water, it might as well be as cute and infantilizing as possible. I'm reminded of my friend Maxwell, who was weaning himself off cigarettes and bought a really obnoxious and embarrassing vape so that he would be more motivated to quit that as well. I relish the day I do not have to track my water intake by "watering" an anthropomorphized dandelion with googly eyes.

You tell the app your height and weight (thankfully it doesn't ask you much else, like "Up until a year ago, were you exclusively drinking Diet Coke because you didn't like the way water tastes?" Which, fine, yes, I'm disgusting and my blood is probably liquid aspartame) and then you get a goal of how much water you should be drinking. Throughout the day, you'll get push notifications about drinking more water, and you can log them based on how you're drinking, like a cup of water (8oz) or a refill of the really expensive Fiji bottle you had to buy because you forgot to bring your own to cycling class (28oz). If you don't drink enough, your plant looks sad and then it dies because life is pain.

For tracking my period, I use Clue. My hypothesis is that everyone, at this point, uses Clue. It's like the Heinz of period apps–there are other options out there, but why would you bother? Clue isn't twee at all, and in addition to tracking your cycle, it also tracks an almost-overwhelming amount of other things like body aches, migraines (hiiii), acne, moodiness, if you took your birth control pill, and how much sleep you're getting. In addition to being dehydrated, guess who was toting around a huge sleep-deficit and was getting migraines from hormone fluctuations because she forgot to take two days worth of birth control pills? This girl.

I hope you're all taking care of yourselves! Let me know in the comments if you've been doing anything that's making you feel particularly great.