Having a social justice warrior meme group has brought people into my life who are serious about their politics and also fucking hilarious.
Have you ever signed onto Facebook and scrolled through your newsfeed expecting mundane day-after-day status updates when BAM! You find out your co-worker who was formerly a he is now a she? Or you see an Instagram photo of your former arch-nemesis sorority sister who is pregnant by her best friend’s boyfriend. Mhmm.
Thanks to the wonderful world of social media, I’ve discovered some shocking things that I might not have learned otherwise, both good and bad. Here are eight real-life OMG moments that I’ve found out through Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.
1. A Friend Comes Out Of The Closet: This happened to me twice, and both times I learned from Instagram. First, I saw a photo of a former high school friend making out with her girlfriend for all the world to see. Then, a fraternity guy I knew in college kept Instagramming photos of himself with gay pride flags and using hashtags like #gay #proud #mygayboys. I had NO idea.
2. Television Spoilers: Thank God DVR wasn’t around when the “Friends” finale aired back in the day, because if someone ruined the Rachel and Ross ending for me, I would have punched a hole in my wall. But people on social media DID ruin several other TV finales for me on that I wasn’t able to catch live, like last season’s final episode of “Nashville.” Bastards.
3. My Boyfriend Had Another Girlfriend: After learning that my Army Lieutenant boyfriend of one-and-a-half years (who got rid of his Facebook account for “work purposes”) may have been cheating on me with some chick named Kylie, I did some research. Facebook confirmed that he was in fact cheating … on Kylie, with me. He was with her for seven years prior to meeting me. He also had a double life, but that’s a story for another day. Thanks, Facebook. I owe you one.
4. A Family Member Got Arrested: God, I hate when this happens. After learning that one of my family members was divorcing her husband, I (and several other family members) decided to see if we were still Facebook friends with the husband or if he removed us. Much to our surprise, typing in his name resulted in multiple articles about his no-good, very-bad arrest that consequently ended his marriage. Whaaaaaaaat?
5. My Mom Is Cooler Than I Thought: I love my mom so much it hurts, but when she got a Facebook page I was ready to throw a funeral for my privacy. I was SHOCKED to learn just how cheeky (and sometimes inappropriate) she is. She “liked” comments about my cleavage and made jokes about my big forehead just like everyone else. Sigh. Love her.
6. My Date Was A Big, Fat Liar: After one guy pursued me on OKCupid for weeks, I finally gave in and agreed to go on a date with him. We talked on the phone and Facebook chatted for two more weeks. The night we were supposed to go out, he texted me telling me that he felt really sick and wanted to reschedule. Four hours later, a photo of him drinking with his friends at a bar popped up on my newsfeed. It was posted from New Jersey. He lives in New York. Busted, jackass.
7. They’re Engaged— Finally! We all waited for it to happen, and then, finally, the “popular” high school sweethearts who we knew would end up together got engaged 14 years after they got together in middle school. Think Kelly Kapowski and Zack Morris. They stayed together through college, have blossoming careers and are just as good looking as they were back in 2001. It’s unfair, really. Social media reminds me of that.
8. I Could Afford To Be Healthier: Sometimes all it takes is a few unflattering tagged photos on Facebook and Instagram, or in my case, a tweet about my ass saying “damn girl, you got a fatty,” for you to take a really hard look at yourself and realize you have been unhappy with the skin you’re in for quite a while. I could afford to be healthier … and photos of my love for cocktails and 30 pound weight gain helps motivate me.
Have you made any OMG discoveries via social media? Share in the comments!
Reprinted with permission from The Frisky. Want more?