Who's Your Hall Pass?

True story: I almost got it on with a famous rapper.
Publish date:
May 18, 2012
cheating, hall pass

Real life photo from the incident described.

True story: I almost got it on with a famous rapper.

Let me back track for a second. Before my last long term relationship officially ended, my boyfriend and I spent a few months in an ambiguous, messy trying-to-make-it-work phase. He had cheated and I wanted to forgive him. I was working as a copywriter for a PR agency at the time, which also meant ghostwriting weird sounds bites for celebrities, including on one occasion an event script for Common. I ended up attending as well.

That night, I met and exchanged numbers with a famous rapper, let’s call him FR. I wouldn't have done this during the solid years with my boyfriend, but given the circumstances it seemed fair.

After the event, FR texted me with an arbitrary question -- “What’s your favorite drink?” I think -- and so began a few months of messaging. He would invite me to his studio, to shows -- groupie things -- and I always declined. This is someone who probably has sex with several people a day so I didn't take the attention too personally.

Besides, I wasn't truly single and anything more than talking via text message wouldn’t have been kosher in my book. I was blindly monogamous.

As my relationship continued to unravel, there wasn’t much trust left between my boyfriend and me. One morning, I woke up to him standing over me with my phone in his hand.

"I was looking for some software and found this," he said brandishing a message from FR. “What’s going on here?”

He was furious, and accused me of sleeping with FR. I tried to explain that we met once and never again spent time together. We were just talking.

“Wouldn’t you prefer I talk to someone inaccessible?” I rationalized. “He’s a rapper, not a real person.”

I don’t think my boyfriend had grounds to be angry with me, but it got me thinking about hall passes -- agreed-upon cheat exceptions. Had we discussed hall passes, FR may have qualified.

What do you think of the hall pass concept? Do you have one? If you had to choose, who would yours be?