trigger warnings
I don't find trigger warnings particularly useful, but our conversations about them tell me a lot about what we think about trauma survivors.
spirituality
"Is this OK?" he asked me. "Do you promise?" That was when I finally stopped it.
in

Mar 26, 2014 at 2:00pm | 79 comments

crime
I don’t know what I’d been expecting to find. Not that.
in

Mar 24, 2014 at 2:00pm | 317 comments

family
I remember very clearly, in primary school, repeating the stories and articulating the knowledge that I came from a family broken by abuse.
in

Jan 18, 2014 at 9:00am | 118 comments

friends
Most people learn trust as a child from the people raising them, but I learned to go on roller coasters on my own.
kindness
She came out with this bag full of groceries, and told me that the food and milk was for the girls and me to eat over the next three days. I don’t remember a time in my life when I ever felt more grateful.
finances
My ex managed to ruin my credit before I ever had any.
misogyny
We're supposed to sit there silently tolerating the abuse, maintaining stiff upper lips.
sisters
I am having a hard time seeing how this was my fault and not hers in the first place.
abuse
Can you offer any suggestions or resources on the best way to share our concern without alienating our sister?
in

Sep 20, 2013 at 6:30pm | 40 comments

sex
When your abuser is convinced, and has others convinced, he is a supporter of women’s rights and social justice, the alienation and betrayal feels all the more disquieting.
in

Sep 17, 2013 at 11:00am | 153 comments

abuse
When you are abused, your self worth depends entirely on the approval of your abuser. In the absence of any sort of approval from my mother, I turned to men.
in

Sep 3, 2013 at 3:00pm | 94 comments

teaching
My psychiatrist told me to leave over and over, because no job was worth this price, and I said no.
family drama
They blamed me for tearing the family apart by calling 911 that night in August.
issues
This is a story about when music is survival.
in

Apr 11, 2013 at 2:00pm | 69 comments

abuse
Everyone talks about the physical aspect of domestic abuse -- which is, of course, no small thing -- but there’s more to it. Conor left me not only physically battered, but nearly bankrupt.
kink
Recently I went home with a kinky man after our first date. The experience phased in and out of being consensual throughout the night. I distinctly left his apartment feeling violated and I continued to feel violated for several days after.
ihtm contest
What had been a complicated father-daughter relationship became an impossible one.
abuse
I feel awful. But feeling and doing something aren’t one in the same.
ihtm contest
John taught me that not every guy was like my husband. It was the push I needed to really see that life could be normal again.
ihtm contest
What makes the situation doubly painful is that some people refuse to even acknowledge that domestic abuse exists “the other way around.”
ihtm
In the seven years of my off-and-on affair with cutting, I've crossed several lines I promised I wouldn't.