Every comment is a brick in the bridge to whatever comes next for us.
Hi readers! Here are five random and unrelated snippets/nuggets/bite-sized items that are coming to mind as I sit here at 2 am the morning before this post runs (unable to sleep, so wondering how much caffeine there is in a half-pint of coffee ice cream -- anyone know?) and trying to be productive by using the insomnia to write this up for you before I am too braindead to do it tomorrow.
The timing of my writing this will also be my handy excuse when you find mistakes in this post. So yay all around! (But do point them out in comments anyway -- I relish the camaraderie of our group grammar-correcting efforts while we are without an actual Copy Editor on staff.)
1) I love Open Threads because they are, overall, such an incredibly supportive little haven.
2) For Mother's Day, what I want most is: For my daughter not to listen to me or to anyone else, but to trust her own instincts. That's what I want for myself and all of you too. (Also, why is the apostrophe there before the s in the word Mother's? Who is this selfish mother who wants the day all to herself, huh??)
3) Some of the conflict in my little world recently made me reread a poem that helped me continue to function when a therapist gave it to me many years ago (make fun of me if you want, if it's fun). You may have heard it too (my mom says the Indigo Girls used some of it for song lyrics?), but here it is again:
People are often unreasonable, illogical and self centered;Forgive them anyway.
If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;Be kind anyway.
If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies;Succeed anyway.
If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;Be honest and frank anyway.
What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;Build anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;Be happy anyway.
The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;Do good anyway.
Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;Give the world the best you've got anyway.
You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God;It was never between you and them anyway.
4) This rat study I've mentioned before that's also been helpful to me lately, so worth repeating. The study (which I can't find anywhere, but which a doctor told me about a few years ago) says so much about being in limbo or in any kind of situation or relationship where you don't know what kind of feedback you are going to get from moment to moment.
It was something like this: they gave these rats two pathways to their food source. Through one pathway, a little mallet (that's how I pictured it anyway) would always hit them on the head and through the other, they would either get hit on the head or be given a nice treat. They used the pathway where they always got hit on the head more often than the other, because nothing is worse than the anxious state of not knowing what you are going to get. That taught me a lot about abusive relationships. Which pathway would you pick to get your food?
5) I have my windows wide open for the first time since the fall and have gotten seven mosquito bites on my legs during what I just wrote. I am wondering again why it is that mosquitos choose me over anyone else in the room. I know it is not what that annoying yoga dude said about them smelling my fear of them, but what is it again that does attract them and do you attract them too?
There are my five little things. Now, I want snippets from you in the form of dirges, haikus, or answers to these extra random stream of consciousness questions:
What is the best anagram in the world?
What's your foolproof getting-back-to-sleep method (or your partner's or your mother's or your roommate's)?
How much sleep do you get a night?
How little sleep counts as "sleep deprivation"?
Have you purchased gifts or made plans for Mother's Day (and WHAT)?
Have you emphatically NOT purchased gifts or made plans for Mother's Day (and WHY)?
Is Sunday your most depression-prone day of the week?
Is taking weekends off an agrarian or religious tradition?
There are all the sleepless thoughts that have been buzzing (like that goddamn mosquito) in my coffee-ice-cream frozen brain. Maybe you'll be commenting late tonight when you can't get to sleep or early, early Saturday morning when you can't fall back to sleep. Either way and any time, you can count on me (and each other!) to be around.
PS There were some comments this week about how invested you all are in this site and I want to reiterate how much I appreciate that and how invested (I'm sure sometimes too much so) I am in your lives and efforts and thoughts too.