YOU ARE THE ADVICE COLUMNIST: I Don't Know If I Should Invite My Former Best-Friend To My Wedding

We had a falling out years ago, but is it ok to have her at my wedding after we reconciled?
Publish date:
April 25, 2014
You Are The Advice Columnist, weddings, friendship, falling out

I'm getting married this winter and only have immediate family coming. I moved out of state and the majority of my extended family simply cannot afford to come. I would love to have more people I know be there, but I never had many friends close enough for me to invite to something like this, except one.

To make a long story short, we met in middle school, were inseparable for many years, but we always had rocky patches in our relationship, mostly thanks to boys. There were times when we weren't great friends to each other, but we always bounced back. I got her hired at my office, but after a half a year or so, we discovered she didn't have the best work ethic. My manager and I fought to keep her there as long as we could, but shortly before I left the job and moved, she was fired. She blamed me, and was mad I was moving 'for some guy', things were said, and we didn't speak for a year.

Recently we reconnected. She apologized for her part and I apologized for mine. She missed me, I missed her. It's as if we weren't ever really not friends, we were just on a surprisingly long bout of being mad/not talking. I'm not sure if I can really call her my best friend still, because us reconciling is still so new, but she was my best friend for 12 years, and she knows me probably better than my fiance even does. My fiance didn't like her, because our friendship dynamic was always odd, and people outside never really understood it. But he's happy to see us on good terms again.

My question is, should I invite her to the wedding? She might not even be able to go, but considering we were such great friends, I feel like I want her there. I always said she'd be my maid of honor, and while that definitely won't happen, I feel like I she should be there. But on the flip side, we have a very rocky history and I'm wondering if keeping her at a distance will be better for our friendship. I'm confused on what I should do, and my mind is pulling me in two different directions.

Do you have any advice for our confused bride-to-be? Let her know in the comments.

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