Speaking Of Pills, I Might Be Overdosing Right Now

My inability to take medication regularly is the reason I am NOT on birth control.
Publish date:
April 9, 2011
mental health, pills

I AM SO. DUMB. CONSTANTLY. Literally every day including today as I'm sitting here writing this, I forget whether or not I've already taken my Wellbutrin, an antidepressant with stimulant properties that I take not to treat depression, but for ADHD.

(FACT: This is a common treatment strategy for people who are so good at remembering to take the speedy stuff that they will do so once every half hour.)

But it obviously is not working. I'm a scatterbrained medication disaster! I'm about to take two Wellbutrin, possibly for the third time today. Because I remember an hour ago being like, I think I didn't take my pills, but I sort of remember taking them. And then I got the bottle, and then I either did -- or did not -- take them again. I do not remember. And now they are right here next to me on the sofa. I'm so confused. Surely you are too. Welcome to Cat's brain!

So I'm about to take two more. There we go; I just did it. Possibly six total.

You're probably like, put them in one of those pill organizer things for every day of the week! NO. I cannot do that. It is too boring and too hard putting the pills in it. I will make someone do it for me when I am rich. Or I'll make my kid do it when I have a kid! Like little Mary Karr bringing baby aspirin to her hungover mother in "The Liar's Club." That's the kind of child who can really prepare a good pill organizer: Children of Alcoholics. I sort of want one.

My inability to take medication regularly is the reason I am NOT on birth control. I am told by many that I should be, but knowing me, hormonal chaos will ensue. How do you remember to take it?