Choose My Next Haircut, xoJane!

I can tell that many of you have been longing to get your itchy little fingers on the snarled mop currently occupying my scalp.
Publish date:
February 13, 2012
hairstyle, make my life choices for me, Hair Color

As many of you have undoubtedly noticed1, I’ve been letting my winter shag grow out a bit. Some people don’t shave their legs in the winter; I don’t bother to cut my hair. Mainly because, most of the time, I don’t really care if other people think it looks like something horrible has set up residence on the top of my head.

This winter I’ve spent most of my time at home, occasionally scuttling to the grocery store, and just haven’t had the energy to do much with my hair. Plus, letting it get a little weedy has provided excellent insulation for cold mornings. It just hasn’t been a high priority for me, and low finances have definitely provided additional motivation for not slinking into my hairdresser’s with an apologetic look on my face so she can wield razors and scissors to see what can be done.

But, it’s getting just long enough to be irritating, and I have some public appearances coming up2, so I actually do need to do something about it. Preferably sooner rather than later. I mean really. My hair is starting to look like it's thinking of going into politics:

I’m not planning on growing it out, although even if I was, I’d still need to cut it to get some sort of shape and body back. As it is, something needs to happen before my hair takes over the world, and so that one clerk at the post office who really hates me will stop giving me weird looks3. Actually I think she might keep giving me weird looks anyway. Because she hates me.

And I thought, hey, why not let you guys choose my haircut?

After all, I can tell that many of you have been longing to get your itchy little fingers on the snarled mop currently occupying my scalp.What could possibly go wrong, right?

Worst case scenario is that it will be awful, but short hair grows out, and my hair grows like a weed, so I might have a few weeks of looking a little funny. But I can’t possibly look funnier than I do right now, so I fail to see how this would be a problem.

Best case scenario is that it will be awesome, and will be a look I wouldn’t have chosen for myself. Which is the point of crowdsourcing things like this, to force yourself to think outside the box a bit. Sometimes that ends up working out really well!

Some things I have been thinking about

I really liked this cut I had last year, which my friend Tristan said made me look like an obnoxious fratboy. Since that was pretty much exactly the look I was going for, I was stoked:

I’m also a fan of very short pixie cuts and think they can look absolutely stellar. Just, for the record.

I tend to prefer low-maintenance hair because I am going to be honest with you: I usually don’t want to mess around with my hair. Sometimes I’ll smear some Kevin Murphy4 glop in it for fun, but that’s about it. Anything that needs to be blown out/flat ironed/wtfever is just not going to happen. I mean, it can happen if you guys vote for it, but the end results will be tragic.

I am also totally open to color, and no color is off the table. If you all want me to have fire engine red hair, fire engine red hair it shall be! Or, you know, a more sedate color. Whatever.

Have at it

Now, I could set you up with some pictures and a poll, but I think that’s boring. The point here is not to force you to choose from haircuts I already like or think might work, but to ask you to actually choose a new haircut, which means I want to hear from you; get discussing and linking up in those comments, hit “like” on the hairstyles you like, and at the end of the week, I’ll take the end decision to the fabulous Denise and we’ll see what happens.

And, of course, I’ll report back with the results.

1. Some of you have even been kind enough to point it out! Return

2. Like on 22 March, where I will be at USC talking about the desexualization of people with disabilities. Return

3. I also had a nightmare last night about waiting for a flight and having small children run screaming from me because I looked “scary.” My hair was heavily implicated in this crushing assessment of my normally dashing good looks. Return

4. Seriously, love this whole line of hair products. Love love love. Return