Pickle Brine Now Comes in a Can, Is My Entire Brand

I actually prefer everything in a can.
Publish date:
June 23, 2016
cocktails, wine, beer, diet coke, pickle juice, la croix, Brine, Cans

I have long been a champion of brine in cocktails, particularly gin cocktails, and have been drinking pickle-tinis for quite some time now.


Pickletini in the bath...because Friday.

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Martha Stewart endorses the pickletini! Who's gross now, bitches?

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I usually just use the juice from the Clausen jar, causing me to usually run out of brine before I run out of pickles, but now I can leave my pickles in their salty bath, because brine now comes in convenient cans.

This product was basically made for me. Not only do I love brine of all kinds, but I love pretty much anything that comes in a can. (I also really love that this is called "Fine Brine," because it reminds me of "Fine Shrine" by Purity Ring.)

Cans are, in my opinion, the best possible vessel from which to drink anything. One of my favorite tactile experiences is taking a can of something out of the fridge and feeling the cold aluminum in the palm of my hand. I love the little "psst" sound cans make when you open them, as if they're about to tell you a delicious secret. The only thing I wouldn't want to drink out of a can is milk, because that frankly sounds revolting for some reason.

But besides milk, I think most liquids are better in a cans. Here are a few of my favorites.

Diet Coke


What is this malarkey?

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Diet Coke in 20 ounce plastic bottles can fuck straight off. (I mean, I'll drink it if I can't find cans, but ugh.) It never tastes as carbonated or as sharp as it does in a can, and I hate the plastic-y smell. I've also found that it just flows better from the opening of a can, which is very important when one is trying to quickly caffeinate, but maybe I'm just bad at drinking from bottles. Also, it now comes in tall boys, which is even better.


Let's get this weekend started!

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Sidebar: Did you know that Diet Cokes expire? I did not, until one of my bartenders had me do a blind taste test to see if I could tell the difference. Expired Diet Coke just tastes like less sweet Diet Coke, which I am okay with. The bar couldn't exactly sell them, so they gave them to me, and I was thrilled to take them off their hands.


This is a bag of expired diet cokes

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Wine in cans is great for a lot of reasons. For starters, no one ever thinks you're drinking wine, and as such I have been able to wander around my neighborhood while sipping on the volumetric equivalent of half a bottle of Pinot. Canned wine is also infinitely more packable and portable than its glass bottled counterpart, making it perfect for picnic-ing and hiking (she says casually, as if she hikes).


And done.

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I fiiiiinally found youuuuuu.

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Though brewers and beer enthusiast can't seem to agree on whether beer does better in a can than in a bottle, I'd be totally fine if every single beer I ever drank from now on came canned. Cans block out light better than any glass ever will, but -- more importantly -- there is something very summery about floating down a river in a tube, cold can of beer in hand. Plus, you don't have to worry about drunkenly breaking a bottle and cutting yourself.

La Croix


Target acquired.

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Like Diet Coke before it, La Croix in a plastic bottle can go straight to hell. It feels flat on the tongue, and tastes less flavorful somehow (at least to me). Also, 12 ounces seems to be the perfect volume to ideal rate of consumption. I always finish a can just before it gets a little too warm, leaving my palate primed for the next frosty can.

What is your favorite drinking vessel? I hear some people like glass, but glass smells weird to me.