Shiny puffer coats in toddler-friendly colors have become an epidemic. Please. Stop.

Hey -- if you want to wear the same sort of coat my five-year-old niece has in a bright, silly color, be my guest. This post isn't for you. However, if your favorite color is black, you're more Raf than Rodarte and you know that sticking out is sometimes about reeling it in; here's the secret: matte not shiny. Trust me.

Back when I was an editor at Condé and Hearst, we would literally have rolling racks labeled "REJECTS" -- guess what was on those racks? Lots and lots of sad, iridescent garments.

So, next time a shiny object catches your eye, resist. Check out the impeccible coats below which are the best of the best, you guys deserve nothing less. Believe me - design teams around the world have these xeroxed and tacked up in their offices and we'll be seeing more of them. (Note: I have not seen your tax returns. I don't know what you make or spend -- here's something for almost everyone at every price point.) I promise they'll be just as warm as their garish counterparts.