Shut Up and Take My Money: It's the Summer of Geeky Swimsuits

From Star Trek to Star Wars to a bathing suit Mr. Goodbody would be proud of.
Publish date:
June 1, 2016
Star Trek, dinosaurs, Star Wars, swim suits, Wonder Woman, Geek, Supergirl, Geeky

Look. We've all said "shut up and take my money," but I don't know that anyone has ever said it harder than when I saw the new Star Trek Next Generation swimwear line from ThinkGeek.

The only real question here is "WHAT COLOR?" Do you want to command the summer? Perhaps engineer a pool party? Science...a...thing? Okay, these puns aren't working. Let's just look at the suits.

Star Trek: TNG Swimwear from Thinkgeek

Just look at these glorious things. All three are good options, though I find it interesting that the red and gold come in "captain," and yet the science officer only comes in "commander."

If you are a little more sensitive and need a bit more coverage, perhaps explore Deanna Troi's seasons 2 and 3 wardrobe.

For the more demure vacationing Star Fleet officer, there is this beautiful, gauzy little romper number.

But these aren't the only geeky swimsuits around. Below you will find twelve more nerdy, though still completely wearable bathing costumes.

For the Geology Nerd

Do you love rocks? Well get ready to rock this sexy little number, which boasts a pattern that is stunningly reminiscent of malachite.

For the Whovians

This monokini is made to order and crafted from the bluest of Tardis blue swim fabric. Tardis sound effects not included, though I'm sure you can manage on your own.

I actually can't think of a more enjoyable day at the beach/pool than yelling "EXTERMINATE" and "YOU WILL EXPLAIN" at my friends and family. (This joke won't get old; trust me.)

For the Med Students

Maybe you're a real pharmacology nerd, or maybe you just really like pills. Either way, this is a cool suit.

This anatomically correct swimsuit is revealing in a completely different way than people are use to, and some may find it off-putting.

Wonder Woman and Supergirl

Sure, there are Batman and Superman swimsuits out there, but these three suits honor the leading ladies of DC Comics.

This plunging neckline, though.

I love adjustable ties, because hips. (Also, is that Bryce Dallas Howard?)

For the Computer Geek

Okay, so this one isn't as literal as the other splashy offerings, but the circuit board-esque pattern here is quite pretty, and Miracle Suits are the actual bomb. If you are a curvier woman, and wish to feel a little more "secure" while splashing about, these suits cinch you in in the most flattering way. I have one. I love it. I plan to buy another.


I'll admit I feel kind of weird about this sexy representation of R2-D2, but not like, that weird.

Sadly, only the top of this suit is in stock, and it's only available in XXL, but I think one of you should get it. So go forth and embrace the Dark Side!

For the Aspiring Paleontologist

I really, really, really wanted to be a paleontologist when I was a child, but then I saw Friends, and Ross Geller ruined the subject for me. I still like dinosaurs though, and this suit is ferocious.

Which of these geeky bathing costumes suits your fancy? Which color Star Fleet swimsuit would you choose? Do you think that cover up is sexy enough to double as lingerie?