The Sales Clerk Told Me This Dress Didn't "Flatter My Curves"

I'm pretty sure the only way this dress isn't flattering to my curves is if you hate looking at them.

Jan 17, 2012 at 12:00pm | Leave a comment

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Sales clerks! They are sometimes the worst, like the time one asked me if I "had a baby to get all those stretchmarks," or that one who was so mean to Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman." Or the one who tried to discourage me from buying this dress over the weekend, because it was "unbecoming."

"Unbecoming!" I laughed, as I headed back into the dressing room. "I haven't heard that word in forever."

"Well, I use it because I'm curvy," she said "So I think it's a nicer way to say it."

Oh snap! We're  talking about my body now? Luckily she couldn't see my face through the closed dressing room door. Cause I'm pretty sure the only way this dress is unbecoming to my curves is if you hate looking at them.

I've been totally open about my struggles to love my body; I'm like the Delta Burke of bloggers when it comes to public weight battles. But in a form-fitting wiggle dress giving my shit a full-body hug? I love my body. I think I look awesome. 

In her defense, I was publicly waffling in front of the mirror, but it was due to the price and proportion of the dress, not because it cradles my muffintop like a swaddled baby. But a dressing room is not an entirely inappropriate place to offer commentary on fit, especially when it is part of your job to help customers select clothing.

It's just that in this instance, the commentary veered dangerously close to body commentary, and as we all know, the only time you should comment on another person's body is if it is spurting blood. And maybe not even then.

Even when I told her that I like showing off my body and had no problem with the way the dress fit, she went on to tell me that she might like it if I wore something over it. OH SO YOU'D THINK THIS DRESS LOOKED GOOD IF I COVERED IT UP?

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Not to pick on the sales clerk per se, because I think this just comes down to two different schools of thought when it comes to managing curves, sort of like the great big booty debate of the last decade -- hide it or flaunt it? I'm a flaunter, and that biatch was trying to cover me up. She'd probbably put Joan Holloway in a muumuu.

Then again, perhaps through all the yo-yo-ing, I have become immune to the details of my own body, like those women who keep wearing their high-school size for decades. For this reason, I left the tag on. If you, xoJane readers, tell me (GENTLY, please GENTLY!) that I'm not doing myself any favors with this look, I will sheepishly return it.

But either way, I want to know: Do you dress to camouflage or maximize your pumps and bumps? I REALLY DO WANT TO KNOW! Am I crazy for thinking the tighter the better?

UPDATE for the people saying it's too big: I actually tried on a medium originally, but switched to a large after the saleslady made me feel bad about myself. She made the same comments while I was in both sizes. Also, should I take it back???