Am I Gross That I Think These Penis Leggings Are Totally Cute?

Publish date:
May 15, 2012
penis leggings

Words used to describe the "Is That a Cock Or Your Legs?" Penis legging in the Jezebel article that introduced me to them: terrible, revolting, appalling , etc.

Word that popped into my head when I first looked at them: CUTE!

I mean, not as much from a distance, but when you get close so you can really see the penises, you know? I'll put the close-up view at the bottom of this article so those of you who are all into "having jobs" can keep them.

Maybe it's a testament to my overwhelming love of penis? I think of them sort of like golden retrievers -- friendly, reliable, enthusiastic. And who wouldn't want leggings covered in golden retrievers? CUTE! I'm thinking it again.

Don't get mad at me; get mad at whatever genetic mishap or barrel of toxic ooze made me so freakishly heterosexual. Some of your are more right-sized in your affiliations with penis, and these leggings are kind of aggressive. How about a dainty penis necklace instead?

I just figure that if there's anywhere in this world where I'm going to find a handful of other people who like these things, it 's here, in the sea of debauchery, violence and perversion that is the xoJane commenters. I mean, you guys will freaking murder people over concealer. Somebody wants penis legs.

NSFW picture below (but everybody knows NSFW means "scroll and look at me really quickly).