STREET STYLE BEAUTY MOMENT : Bright Red + Lotsa Jewelry = HOTTTT. Plus: Cat Is Slutty

Killer statement-making beauty products can make you look chicer. And I have a lot of sex! Read on.
Publish date:
June 15, 2011
jewelry, nails, nailpolish

This girl is killing it. The thumb ring? The big, um, long ring that I don't know the official name of? A shield ring; that's it. Plus all of those bracelets? And then the bright red manicure. Ooh, and she's wearing leather leggings. Needless to say, I want to be this bitch. So glamorous.

You see how beauty products can actually make you look cooler? This is street-style beauty: Her outfit could be the plainest T-shirt and black leggings-thing in the world (FACT: those might be pleather), but then this girl brushes a piece of hair out of her face and you see her manicure-and-loaded-on-jewelry combo and BAM, she's killing it. KILLING it.

We should all copy her. Here, try Revlon Top Speed Fast Dry Nail Enamel in Chili. It has that electric brightness factor to it. And it sets in 60 seconds (which in play-it-safe-speak to me means 3 minutes, which is still very impressive).

I am wearing currently no jewelry on my hands because I keep getting skanky rashes from it all. Because it's cheap! I buy everything off the street when I'm walking around in my neighborhood. As if I'm ready to own expensive jewelry. Do you know how many dudes' nightstands I have left my rings and bracelets and earrings on? ...Well, neither do I exactly, but let's just say it happens a lot.

In fact, the first text message I get from a guy after I've slept with him (he always texts me first -- not like I'm playing games; I just don't text people) is always, "You left an earring at my house." Or a ring (I like this, uh, "Jewelry Payless" brand sterling silver shield ring). Or whatever. Point is, I never get them back.

Anyway, that was my update on how big of a slut I am. A slut with cheap jewelry and finger rashes! Which is the best kind. Remember, "SLUT" is never a insult here at, and especially when I use it.

That Revlon polish is only $5 or so, BTW. Has anyone tried it? List some other bright reds from other brands you like, too, in comments.