Offensive Wednesday: The Martin Luther King, Jr. Bath Mitt (I'M Not Offended, Just FYI)

Plus, weren't the biracial romances on "Sex and the City" just HORROR SHOWS? Who let the screenwriters just DO that? Discuss.

Jun 8, 2011 at 11:02am | Leave a comment

"Sex and the City": it's a show I find myself watching with increasingly fearful obsessiveness as the years go by, because I'm convinced that once I enter my 30s and I don't get married and I'm obvs wearing cute outfits and am all wild-haired blonde and witty and a writer in Manhattan and things -- anyway, I'm terrified that I'm going to be perceived as "Carrie Bradshaw"-ish, somehow, and by whom exactly I don't know, but I'm dead-set on that NOT happening.

I'll get to the bath mitt in a second.

Is it me or did that show have THE worst "black guest star" storylines EVER? They were AWFUL! Like remember when Samantha went out with that black dude and they had sex listening to "soft" rap music and went to clubs where Samantha was I think METAL-DETECTED and all the black people STARED HER DOWN?! And then they broke up because the dude's SOUL FOOD CHEF sister couldn't handle him dating a white woman?!

Pffffft.

And Miranda's black dude relationship arc was only slightly better! Wasn't there a scene where she was eating something chocolate and he was all, "You like chocolate?" And "JULES AND MIMI"?! The made-up BBC show that SATC actually bothered to invent and film to be a show-within-a-show for like two minutes in one episode -- just for a cutesy biracial romance-parallel joke?! WHAT!!

But what was I talking about? Martin Luther King, Junior. Puns. Bath mitts. Right. Here is this bath mitt! It is questionable. I think because of the pun. "I Have A Clean"! Lord. It reads like a TITLE of an episode, actually. During the Berger episodes, when Carrie was at her punny worst. 

Like in the horrible made-up episode Carrie would buy him a fug and incidentally SUPER-gay Prada buttondown from a slimy closeted Italian and it would actually become an issue (OH WAIT THAT WAS A REAL PLOT LINE) since Berger was supposed to be Dave Eggers by now but was failing and couldn't afford his cleaning lady so she was helping but he was still being a bitch -- and she felt soo discriminated against for making more money despite being a woman so then she got all, "I Have A Clean" with the girls at that stupid coffee shop with the checkered china and Samantha would be all, "Amen, sister!" and Charlotte would BLURT OUT something irrevelvant about her menstruating dog (WAIT, THAT WAS ALSO A STORY LINE) and then DING (there was always something dinging!); SCENE

What a bad episode! I knew it would be.

ANYWAY. This is a loofah with the face of a slain civil rights leader on it, and you are meant to scrub it all over your naked body. You can buy it right here, for like ! Obviously this is from the U.K., aka the nation full of weirdos who eat plant food to get high! You see, English peoples' minds just go places that ours don't.


From the website:

"MLK is such an inspiration that we decided to sell this very, very funny washing aid in his honour."

Ha; I mean it's not THAT funny, but it is funny that they think it's that funny, in't it? Whatever. I keep thinking about the worst "Sex and the City" puns and things; they haunt me. I like the show so much still but like every five seconds there's a moment that makes me want to kill a child. Yes? Let's talk about them in the comments section!

Oh yeah, and about this bath mitt. You mad at it? I think it's amazing and want it in my shower; there, I said it. Holler.