It's gonna get sappy up in here.
Oddly, I was never really into Jem and the Holograms as a child. Isn't that weird? A cartoon pop star with pink hair, that just screams "Tynan."
I don't know, I was probably more sophisticated as a little guy.
However, I am stoked on the makeup collection Sephora did to celebrate the release of the live action movie. (It seems they were the only ones celebrating the release of the live action movie. Have you seen the reviews? I digress.)
The movie may have tanked, but you can't deny that the Jem franchise lends itself to a beauty collab. Say what you want about the film, but I can assure you, the beauty line is worth getting excited over.
Let's start with the star of the show: The Truly Outrageous Eyeshadow Palette. $39.
Confession: I'm really over eyeshadow palettes. After everyone treated like the Naked palette like the second coming of Christ or the release Rihanna's eighth album, every beauty company on earth is doling out cash cow palettes. I'm just bored.
Actually, no, here's the real reason: I'm terrible with eyeshadow. I'm pretty decent with everything else but with my hooded eyelids and my unsteady hand, eyeshadow has just never really worked on me. Basically I'm just jealous of you all and your pretty, smoky lids and I feel left the fuck out.
The Totally Outrageous Palette comes includes 24 shadows, most of them shimmery, from a pretty champagne, rose gold, and silver, to turquoise, purple, and of course, pink. It's kind of like someone took the best of the Naked palette, the Naked 3 palette, and the Electric palette, and created this baby. It's a pretty good buy for $39, if you ask me.
To show just how much mileage you can get out of this set, I did my entire face using this one eyeshadow palette (minus the lips, those come later.) Observe.
For some unknown reason, I applied a pretty, champagne-y smoky eye, even though I suck at smoky eyes. I think it came out ALRIGHT.
Here's what I used.
First, I put GAL PAL, a satin cream, all over my lid.
On the inner corners, I used Kimber, a shimmery pinky rose gold.
On the outer corners and up into my crease, I used Rockstar, a steely lavender, and then blended it out.
What do you think?
Oh, while we're on this extreme close-up, I used an angled brush to fill in my brows with Jetta, a matte chocolate brown which was surprisingly pigmented.
For a highlight on the top of my cheekbones, I used Minx, a shimmery pewter-gold.
And finally, for a subtle blush, I used Mrs. Bailey, an grapefruit copper.
I stay AWAY from orange tones on my cheeks, but with all of the shimmery cool tones on my eyes and cheeks, this was a nice, rich choice to warm my face up.
Not bad, right? I think it's a good example of how you can do a lot more with eyeshadow palettes than just, you know, your eyes. What do you think?
If you're looking for a look that's a little more "Jem," don't worry. I got you.
First, grab a pink liner.
I snatched the Retractable Lip Liner in Hot Pink from NYX, $4.50.
Line your eyes. Start a little bit outside your waterline.
Err, a lot outside your water line. Drag the pencil into a curved, reverse C shape.
Now fill it in with Jerrica, a hot pink with just a bit of shimmer.
BOOM! You're Jem!
This is a look that's appropriate for any time. The office, lunch with investors, dinner with the in-laws, or a quick trip to the corner store. It's a look that's as versatile as the palette that created it.
Another kick ass part of the collection is the Truly Outrageous Liquid Lip Set, $25.
YES. You guys know I love a liquid lipstick. This set is the perfect balance of colors that are Jem-inspired, and colors that are very on-trend. The formula is great, too! They dry down to a demi-matte finish and stay in place pretty well. Don't worry, I've swatched them all below on my snarling lips.
In the smoky eye photos above, I was wearing Like A Dream, a dusty rose-mauve.
I FEEL like it's a teeny bit darker on the lip than in the tube, but it's still a sick color. It's like, the perfect marriage of a vintage rose-colored gown and a ball sack.
Next is To The Rescue, which is almost just a darkened shade of Like A Dream, with more berry worked into it.
She's Got The Power is a dark royal purple.
LOVE this color but it's the only one I had a little trouble applying. Let your first pass dry down completely before you coat it again. That way, you'll get even coverage without just pushing the color around.
Music Is Magic is a bright, BRIGHT pink.
The liquid set also comes with Fashion Fame, which is a top coat with glitter suspended on a sheer, baby pink base. That's below, hold on.
It's the Jem shade. Bright pink with intense blue undertones and a satin finish.
Below, I've topped it with Fashion Fame, the glitter top coat.
To round the collection out, there's a sleek little gold compact mirror, so you can make sure you're makeup is on 10 wherever you go.
Remember when people used mirror compacts instead of turning their iPhone cameras to selfie mode? Neither do I.
Have you grabbed anything from the Jem collection? What's your favorite eyeshadow palette? Did I bomb the smoky eye? Tear me apart in the comments.
Tynan is a cartoon pop star on Twitter @TynanBuck.