It's gonna get sappy up in here.
I started wearing makeup young, and boy did I like it.
You can gain weight, your feet can swell, but your face is your face. And you can daub it in bright colors, make it glow with highlighter, shade in cheekbones where cake has softened them, paint those stubby lashes so that they frame the eyes, feign health when you’ve really been awake for a whole weekend. I LOVE MAKEUP.
When first experimenting with makeup, I was from the "You can’t get enough eyeliner" school of thought. To some extent, I still believe this, but as I’ve gotten older, wearing less eyeliner has suited me better. I’ve graduated to a fresher look, although I still whack on as much mascara as I can get my grubby paws on. I can’t imagine that changing.
A few readers have asked about my eye makeup and how I do it, so here it is! I did a video, too -- so if you can be bothered, you can watch me putting my slap on in my bedroom. Voyeurs, unite! Chris walks in at one point, totally naked! He doesn’t really. Or does he? You’ll have to watch!
A Sheer, Dewy Base
OK, so with a semi-dramatic eye like the one I sport on a daily basis, I like to have quite a sheer, dewy base. I don’t want anything too heavy, as the eye makeup is the star attraction here. No cakey base for me. On good skin days, I use L’Oreal Nude Magique BB Cream. It sadly doesn’t come in a wide variety of shades, which hopefully they will address soon, as it really is great. I smooth it all over my face, including the eyelids.
Next, I use an eyelid primer. I was always skeptical of eye shadow primers, but since trying the Benefit Stay, Don’t Stray, I’m a convert. You pat it all over the eyelid, and it mattifies and creates a nice, smooth, even base for your upcoming delightful artwork!
Shadow 1 -- The Neutral
The first of three shadows I use is a Benefit eye shadow in the shade "Leggy." I have used the Big Beautiful Eyes kit since it came out and I bone it hard. The lightest neutral shade in that is a gorgeous champagne shade. When I was in Chicago, I asked the SA in Sephora what the closest stand-alone shade to that was, and she told me it was Leggy. So I bought it, and have used and loved it ever since. You might prefer a less iridescent shade; basically, go for a bone, champagne or light dusky pink (but not so pink that you end up looking like you have myxomatosis).
I pat the color all over my eye, stopping short of the brow bone. Other shiny stuff is going up there, don’t worry!
Shadow 2 -- The Contour
Take a second, darker color and apply with a puffy round edged brush into the socket of your eye, creating a contoured effect. The idea here is to make your eyes look bigger, more wide awake.
The Winged Liner
The winged liner is what gives the look a slightly retro feel. I start drawing my flick where my pupil is when I look straight on, and I drag it up and out into a pointed line. I fill in underneath and don’t worry too much about whether it’s 100% neat as it gets smudged about anyway in the next step. I’ve tried hundreds of liquid liners and Rimmel Exaggerate cannot be beaten, seriously! If there is a better liquid liner, budget or not, I’ll eat my hat, or something.
Shadow 3 -- Sex It Up
Now I take a flat-edged brush, lick it (I’m gross, sorry) and dab it in a smoky dark brown shadow. You guessed it, I use the one in the Big Beautiful Eyes kit! I’m so predictable. I follow the line of the liquid liner and smudge over it, erasing harsh lines and creating a slightly smokier effect. Sex it up! Be brave! Channel Selma Hayek!
Eyebrows! The Curtains to Your Soul
We mustn’t forget our eyebrows. When creating a look which draws people to the eye, it’s just not good enough to let the side down with a wishy washy brow. I use a soft, pigmented wax to create an arch and fill in those sparse bits and stick down any stragglers! I have blonde brows so they need a lot of help. After the wax, I finish with a setting powder. I use the Benefit Brow Zings set. As we’ve kind of got a sixties vibe going on with the winged liner, I like to create a dramatic retro arched brow to set it off.
Mascara -- Lots
At the moment, I am using a Rimmel mascara called Scandaleyes Show Off, which looks like a big pink vibrator and brings me almost as much pleasure. It has a rounded tip that's perfect to get all those teeny tiny little lashes at the corner of your eyes to get a real fanned out, Bambi effect. Two coats, at least! You have been told.
I finish up by dabbing some Nars Orgasm liquid highlighter on my cheekbones, brow bones, cupids bow and nose to really make me look like I have just been at a spa and I’m not commuting by train to a non-air conditioned office. It’s magical! My Holy Grail! It has dragged me out of the fiercest hangover and made me almost believe that my liver didn’t actually hate me.
Take a look at the video to see me doing it all in REAL TIME. Technology!!!