Is this weird? OKCupid is Still Giving Sexy People Special Treatment

"We'll recommend more attractive people to you. You'll also appear more often to other attractive people." YIKES.

Jun 19, 2012 at 4:00pm | Leave a comment

I don't online date, mostly because my best friends do. The portal of choice for most of them is OKCupid -- I've never used it, personally, although I did set up a dummy profile when two of my friends found out they had dates arranged with the same user. (I was not about to be left out of the stalking/messing with him party. Poor fella.)

OKCupid seems to skew younger and weirder than your more traditional marriage-minded dating sites, and seems to draw a greater percentage of people who are like "I'm a humanist/Satanist library science candidate, please be one too" or "I'm a poly, professional aerialist in an open marriage. No games please!" A lot of them refer to sex as "play," which in my humble Midwestern opinion is just horrifying, and should be done under no circumstances, ever.

Seriously kooky users beget seriously kooky dates, although I don't necessarily think you always know when you're going to get a real nutter. My poor friend D could (and should) write a book about all of the matches who waited until there was tapenade on the table to politely reveal that they were bonkers. Like, say, the 20something who waited til mid-date to admit that he'd just fled a very restrictive religion, leaving behind a wife and six children. Just yesterday, OKC "suggested" my friend W contact a match who enjoys -- can't make it up, friends -- being "demeaned" by being smeared with desserts, particularly "cake, pie, batter and syrup."

I know -- we all know a thousand of these H.P. Lovestories. In fact, 99.9999999% of the people I know who have used dating sites have had what we in the INTERNET INDUSTRY call "negative user experiences." Except my one really really ridiculously (one word) goodlooking friend whom we'll call Hansel.

Hansel is VERY pretty, and he also has a great personality, so he already has a leg up in life and I guess in online dating. But something about this email he received (a little too gleefully, Hansel!) is a little weird.

image

Jesus Plesus.

I guess that this feature has been in place for a few years now, but I don't know how to feel about it.

Sure, it'll be nice for Hansel to go on dates with other pretty people who can sit there and be pretty together, but ick ew gross. It's like the "Simpsons" episode with the Beautiful People Club, no? I mean, isn't this just a little bit like, GATTACA-esque?

I think Hansel should quit OKC out of a general sense of outrage. But maybe I just want him to be more available to listen to me bitch about my lovelife and not have to worry if the circles under my eyes are hurting his delicate, beautiful sensibilities.

What say you guys? Is this gross? Do you have any good OKCupid horror stories? Any of you guys want to smear that dude with syrup? He seems pretty nice.