YOU ARE THE ADVICE COLUMNIST: The Best Friend Problem

How do I get over this? What is he thinking?

Feb 27, 2014 at 6:30pm | Leave a comment

image
I've known him for over 8 years, and I've liked him for almost just as long. It was something that I could never control, no matter how much I tried. We're flirty and he would remember little things about our times together, and I always felt like something was there, as did our friends. Now we're both in college, and while we were drunk, I told him how much I like him and that I didn't really want a relationship but I needed to tell him so I could just get past this. And he was amazing about it, holding me and telling me to get it all out and that it was okay. He was beyond shocked and he never saw this coming. He later told a mutual friend that he's just known me too long and as of now, he just sees me as a friend. Also, when I told him about my feelings, he had a girlfriend, and the week after, he broke up with her. I'm just crushed, and as much as I kept saying that I didn't want a relationship, I was in love with the guy and hoped he had some sort of feelings for me too. He wanted me to be normal and not awkward around him, but I'm not sure I can do that so I'm giving myself some space. How do I get over this? What is he thinking?
I just know that there is some sort of a connection beyond just friendship, and I think that he doesn't notice it because it's always been there and he never really considered me as anything but a friend, mainly because our moms are best friends and we see each other all the time and we've seen each other grow up. If I give myself space and hopefully get over him, will he ever realize what he had? I can't help feeling that he is it for me.

Have you dealt with this dilemma before? Let her know what you did in the comments!

Send all of your major life issues to Advice@xoJane.com. Now!