Melissa - xoJane

It Happened To Me: My Best Friend Committed Suicide

Melissa — Fri, 04 Jan 2013 16:00:00 -0500

Today, or sometime around today, is an anniversary that I felt in my body before the why came to mind. Around this time, in 2010, a good friend of mine took her own life. She was 27 years old.

Why I'm Not Down With Food Stamp Challenges

Melissa — Mon, 03 Dec 2012 11:00:00 -0500

Want to know what it’s like to live on food stamps? Ask the 46 million Americans who do it everyday, not as a “challenge” or for publicity but because they can’t afford food.

Broke Thoughts: I'm Considering Going Back into the Sex Industry

Melissa — Thu, 29 Nov 2012 11:00:00 -0500

“Broke” is a relative term. Certainly, I could have a lot less. I could have not just paid my bills. I could have not just gotten my hair colored -- at Bumble and Bumble, no less.

Not Spending Thanksgiving with your Family? Me Neither

Melissa — Thu, 22 Nov 2012 14:00:00 -0500

And I think I'm all right with that.

The Limits of Free Speech: Does Posing for Racy Pictures Make A Woman Unfit for a Job in Education?

Melissa — Tue, 09 Oct 2012 16:30:00 -0400

In the age of the Internet, especially, when everything may be recorded and nothing is forgotten, I think it’s time that we, as a society, broaden the spectrum of who constitutes a good employee.

Why I Choose to Talk About My No-Big-Deal Abortion

Melissa — Thu, 12 Jul 2012 14:00:32 -0400

A couple years ago, on my commute to work, I was met by a poster featuring a glum-faced woman staring blankly at me, “I thought life would be like the way it was before,” it read. Then: “Abortion changes you.” No, it didn’t, I remember thinking at the time. Speak for yourself.

On Anderson Cooper and the Politics of "Coming Out"

Melissa — Mon, 02 Jul 2012 17:00:20 -0400

Whereas I realize better than most the costs of turning your life and your very identity into a political statement, I also know that it is sometimes our secrets that make us sick, more so than whatever it is that we’re hiding.

I Don't Have the Privilege of Being Fabulously Unique

Melissa — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 18:00:20 -0400

Erica Jong recently commented on the phenomenon of not paying writers for content, which she seems to think is getting worse. "Authors are blogging everywhere for free,” she said, “and it’s not a good development. They are starving.”

Shame Someone You Love on TV (And Get a Makeover)

Melissa — Tue, 19 Jun 2012 10:30:26 -0400

Even before scandal drew my sex work history to light, in my daily life, my coming clean -- or not -- had always been an issue.

Context is Everything: Ann Romney and "Women Who Don't Have a Choice"

Melissa — Wed, 25 Apr 2012 18:00:23 -0400

Ann Romney’s remarks about “women out there who don’t have a choice” perfectly captures certain rich people’s deep-seated beliefs about class -- namely, that class inequity is a positive thing, and that there's something noble about poverty.

On Girls, Visibility and Why You Won't See Me on MSNBC

Melissa — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 14:00:22 -0400

Growing up, I never saw myself represented in media. I still don’t.

"I'm Sorry You Feel That Way": Fauxpology Not Accepted

Melissa — Mon, 19 Mar 2012 13:00:22 -0400

A fauxpology is the opposite of a sincere, thoughtful apology. It is not caring that you’ve upset someone, not acknowledging their feelings as valid and legitimate. It’s saving one’s own ass.

In Defense of Marie Calloway

Melissa — Wed, 29 Feb 2012 11:00:14 -0500

Following the publication of her story, Marie Calloway -- a college student originally from Nevada, self-described as “introverted and sensitive,” 18 at the time the story had been lived -- found herself the center of a media attention that was largely negative and loudly debating whether or not Marie Calloway and the likes of her deserved any attention at all.

Please Don’t Send me a Picture of your Weiner and No, I Don’t Want to “Meet up”

Melissa — Mon, 20 Feb 2012 09:00:16 -0500

Being sexually available and making men feel good about themselves is work, and I don’t have to do it for free.

My Anger Issues: Or I Kick People in the Head

Melissa — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 14:01:57 -0500

In cardio-kickboxing the other night, I sidekicked the woman next to me full strength in the head. I didn't do it on purpose, but I wasn't sorry it happened.

IHTM: I Did a Sexy Pictorial for Penthouse

Melissa — Thu, 22 Dec 2011 09:00:14 -0500

Had you asked me a year ago if I would have considered writing for Penthouse, let alone taking pictures, I would have feigned insult.

My Mom’s Take on Pretty Woman

Melissa — Tue, 04 Oct 2011 12:00:10 -0400

I can’t comprehend how hard it was for my mom to think of her daughter selling sex, given what a misunderstood industry it is.

I'll Try Anything Once: Enthusiastic Consent

Melissa — Mon, 19 Sep 2011 13:00:09 -0400

Melissa Petro says Yes! Yes! Yes! to sex. (Or, a Portrait of a Relationship After a Major Sex Scandal).

It Happened to Me: I Was In The "Rubber Room"

Melissa — Thu, 08 Sep 2011 13:00:16 -0400

What happens to "bad teachers?" After the New York Post made my sex work past front-page news, I spent 30 weeks finding out.