Emily V Gordon - xoJane

What Working With My Spouse Has Taught Me About Work and Love.

Emily V Gordon — Wed, 22 Aug 2012 15:00:00 -0400

He's my co-worker, he's my life partner, and he's a grown up, just like me.

Move In Together, But For God's Sake, Keep Your Couch

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 19 Jul 2012 18:00:21 -0400

Keeping your own furniture around "just in case" is the modern, non-famous, non-married form of a pre-nup.

Are You a Jesus Girlfriend?

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 05 Jul 2012 09:00:20 -0400

Have you ever wondered how your boyfriend would eat/have clothes without you? Have you frequently been told by dudes how "perfect" you are for them, followed by "I don't know how you put up with me"? If so, then you might be a Jesus Girlfriend.

How to Embrace Your Summer Grossness This Year

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 28 Jun 2012 12:00:23 -0400

I've grown out of letting how I look dictate how much fun I'm having, but I'm still weighing the pros and cons of summer on feminine beauty.

How Do Childless Adult People Interact With Their Parents?

Emily V Gordon — Wed, 27 Jun 2012 10:00:23 -0400

Am I alone in the ever-evolving guilty feeling that I'm not communicating with my parents enough?

The Dos and Donts of Dealing with a Chronically Ill Person

Emily V Gordon — Tue, 29 May 2012 10:00:17 -0400

Do offer your support in the form of a cocktail, ice cream, a kitten video -- this is especially helpful if you have a hard time knowing what to say to people with medical issues. Ice cream says it all.

Nerds Do Not Need Your Pity Sex

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 24 May 2012 10:30:29 -0400

I don't know if you've noticed, but nerd culture is kinda the big thing going now. THEY GET LAID. A lot.

On Being a (Sort of) Recovering Hair Dye Addict

Emily V Gordon — Fri, 18 May 2012 17:00:22 -0400

My hair's only constant is that it always changes.

White Rice, Cherry Limeade And Other Childhood Foods I Thought Were "Healthy'"

Emily V Gordon — Fri, 11 May 2012 12:00:19 -0400

I was in college (COLLEGE!) when it dawned on me that drinks had calories in them.

Insta-Zen: A Quick and Dirty Guide to Instagram Jealousy

Emily V Gordon — Tue, 08 May 2012 20:35:17 -0400

Please. Let's not make brunch snarking a thing.

Cutesy Racism and Why I'm Not Eating Popchips Anymore.

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 03 May 2012 14:34:33 -0400

If you are going to be racist, you better be saying the funniest thing anyone has ever heard.

Having (And Keeping) a BFF After You're No Longer Single

Emily V Gordon — Mon, 30 Apr 2012 12:00:27 -0400

Yes, it was pretty codependent. Gloriously so. My husband became an afterthought to Morgan and I, and he seemed okay with it.

A Timeline of One Girl's Relationship With Her Body

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 15:05:29 -0400

"Look!" she says, innocently enough, "Your legs are like, twice as big as mine!" I never prop my legs up again, and from that one comment, I feel myself turning inward, trying to become smaller than I am.

HELP! I'm an Awkward Exiter

Emily V Gordon — Tue, 10 Apr 2012 13:00:22 -0400

I know how to banter at a party -- I just don't know how to make a break for it.

The Benefits of Blending In

Emily V Gordon — Wed, 04 Apr 2012 14:00:31 -0400

When I travel, I desperately want to be thought of as a local.

Confessions of a Former Romantic Obsessive

Emily V Gordon — Fri, 16 Mar 2012 09:00:34 -0400

It recently occurred to me that perhaps one of the reasons some women are constantly focused on “snagging a man” is that it frees up some of our brain space.

Actually Dying of Stress? It's a Thing (And Here's How You Can Avoid It)

Emily V Gordon — Mon, 27 Feb 2012 15:00:16 -0500

I have a rare condition where too much stress can actually kill me, but my treatment can probably help you to not wig out too.

What RuPaul Taught Me About My Femininity

Emily V Gordon — Wed, 08 Feb 2012 18:00:20 -0500

I eventually realized, while reading papers about how women should be taken seriously for their ideas and not just their looks, that discounting femininity was part of The Patriarchy too.

Let Us Now Celebrate the Aging Party Girl

Emily V Gordon — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 18:00:18 -0500

I didn't hate these girls -- I was obsessed with them, and worse, jealous.

Why Do All TV Couples Hate Each Other?

Emily V Gordon — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 14:00:15 -0500

I feel like at some point in time, some network fat cat set a rule that sitcoms are funnier when the married/partnered couples seem to be barely tolerating each other. And it's a bummer.