positions
I don't like to bang in any position I couldn't conceivably fall asleep in.
dating
As I’m getting older and attempting to better myself, I foresee the things I once found annoying yet tolerable (i.e., thinks weddings are bullshit, hates to read, refuses to have a dog) turning into total deal-breakers.
laziness
Hey you -- got any advice on how to get my life together next year?
makeup
FINALLY. Makeup you can wear on an all-nighter.
food
My great grandma used to slaughter her own chickens. I complain about the effort it takes to put vegetables in a bowl with some dressing.
laziness
At 32 years old, I should know how to do stuff like prepare for the worst. Instead I let my boyfriend watch the Weather channel nonstop, calmly looking up from my favorite fantasy novel a few times to ask, "So what's our plan?"
curly hair
Since I am someone who is a former hair abuser (there’s a record on file: feel free to see previous photos of my hair on the Interwebs), I like to say "I’m sorry” to my hair at night a couple of times a week.
alcoholism