Rehab counselors warned us not to stay friends with each other after treatment since most us wouldn’t stay sober, but I felt like Gerry and I would somehow make our post-rehab friendship work, despite the fact that he would always be a hardcore criminal.
It’s still difficult for me to adjust to having male attention that isn’t rife with sexual undercurrents. It’s making me realize how I’ve become accustomed over the years to using my sexuality as bait for male attention.
I knew I could lose Marcus at any time, and was keenly aware of this when I’d visit him in the hospital, or when I’d lay my head on his chest and feel the irregular beats of his heart and the edges of his defibrillator just beneath his skin.
One of the candidates had just begun a 40 day yoga challenge. Another had just started a raw food diet. When it was my turn to answer, I told them I had recently started cooking at home more often instead of eating out. This was technically true, as long as you consider putting frozen pizza in the oven cooking.
I’ve been photographed in 13 countries and four states, tied up everywhere from stunning church ruins to secret underground dungeons below country mansions and have stomped down catwalks in just about every kind of outfit imaginable.
All we needed was my dad’s permission and a bunch of paperwork, and I could be on his health insurance, live with him senior year, and most importantly, cut down on or completely eliminate contact with my dad.