massage therapy
Please don’t make comments about what I look like and don’t ask me if I know the Lord. None of your session is about me.
cell phones
No matter how many screeds will be written bemoaning the effect technology has had on our socialization skills, facts are facts: Most of us are not going to be able to leave our phones in our pockets for an entire evening.
how not to be a dick
This job made me want to jump from the 10th floor of my building on a daily basis.
fast food
Unlike goldfish, we actually remember when you treat us poorly, and we will judge you next time you come in.
how not to be a dick
"I’m not a racist. I think mixed race babies are the cutest!"
mother's day
I am now at the point in my life when there have been more years of not having a family than years having a family.
how not to be a dick
Here's a tip. If the job "really isn't that much," then why don't you just do it yourself?
gay marriage
Please don’t console me with sayings like “God has a plan for you” or “They went to be with Jesus” when something bad happens.
trans issues
Don’t out people. Don’t out people without their permission. Just don’t do it.
I don’t know why, but something about bad behavior in a movie theater turns me into Michael Douglas in “Falling Down.”
If there are blood stains all over your clothes don't bring them in!
I feel pretty secure in the knowledge that not wanting my own children is not the same thing as being a heartless, selfish, baby-hating bon vivant.
After many years as a seasonal employee, I've developed a keen sense of what actually constitutes good manners while shopping. You probably don't have them. You're rude and annoying and you probably don’t even know it.
Being identical twins can be kind of hard for us sometimes, as I imagine it is for other twins, because of how some people act around us.
how not to be a dick
I should just “get it over with?” Sorry, but I’m not going to find some random guy to have sex with so you can feel more comfortable about my (non)sex life.