When I'm drunk, I'm on vacation from being a mom. My shift has ended, and I am now like a tax-write-off dependent and my friends are my guardians.
motherhood
classy drinks
I hate how "girly" is supposed to be an insult. So let's talk drinks. Plus recipes for three of my fave cocktails.
bars
Oh, hey there! It’s me, your friendly neighborhood bartendress, rolling out of bed at noon to give you a few pointers on how not to be like the bachelorette who barfed into my ice bin last night.
it happened to us
Which xoJaner got drunk on vanilla extract? Which one sat on a couch downing SKYY and cranberry juice while watching "Titanic"? Who ended up with a shorn head? CLICK TO FIND OUT!
drinking
I flipped in the air and almost died. More importantly, I came scarily close to hitting people, too.
alcohol
For those of you following along at home, it should be pretty apparent by now that I will eat/drink anything for attention and/or love.
alcohol
Now that my experiment in going alcohol-free for a year is up, I’m not sure if I should go back to drinking.
addiction
Sober, I learn, bars don't look so hot, they aren't that fun. At 9 o’clock, we arrive together talking in the same tongue, and by 9:45, we’re in different orbits.
tv
Did you make a legendary ass out of yourself at your holiday party, too? Well, thank God for that. Because it might get you on TV -- and everyone likes TV!
alcohol
Here’s a manic list of things that you can do this summer that are awesome and don’t involve barstools, though you could drink WHILE doing them, should you choose.
addiction
I'd been so far from feeling empowered to treat myself with kindness, that I needed two 26-year-old cops to tell me "Get off the road, fool."
drinking
Because nothing says "well-rounded woman of the world" like the ability to conjugate verbs after six sambucas.
drinking
I'm a five-foot-two-inch 125-pound woman, and four drinks can put me in a very dangerous situation.
alcohol
It's totally possible to talk about wine without all the overblown description. Although I will explain "oakiness."
birth control
Here's a list of things that I said during a week of apocalyptic women's health news that made me feel like I had entered a real-life version of the Handmaid's Tale.
drinking
This will be the first time in 15 years I've gone for a whole month without drinking. My liver and I are relying on you to keep us honest.
drinking
I didn't even feel this bad when my parents got divorced. Of course, I was two, but STILL.
bicycles
Trying new things can be scary and intimidating, so I tested four workouts so you wouldn't have to. And then I drank.
baseball
When this non-famous person showed up to a baseball game in a Giants' jersey, fishnet stockings, and very little else, I didn't expect to be bullied.
arrest
It was the single thing in our relationship that we fought about: the frequency with which he drank, the money that he threw away on alcohol and the ramifications of something bad happening if he didn’t get himself under control.
bad advertising
A new ad campaign by the Pennsylvania Liquor Control Commission uses an ad that almost defies parody to make the case that if you drink too much, someone might rape your friend, and it will be your fault.
beer
A strange feeling went through me at this news; a sort of pang that took a moment to identify. I realized I was sad. I was sad that I couldn’t drink beer anymore.
