Being codependent, my favorite high is helping. Which means, along with unhealthy behaviors, passing along good advice I've gotten or made up (like my old zinc trick). One of my favorite pieces of advice, aside from that one about putting on your own oxygen mask first, is this one that I've been using myself a lot this week. It goes: Take the action and trust the outcome.
My friend Loretta told me that one years ago, when I was debating whether to write an email to some company requesting a meeting about getting xoJane started. Or something. I actually don't remember exactly what I was fretting about work-wise and wanting to avoid doing. Of course, the easier route would have been not to write the email and trust that the universe would take care of this for me.
But I took the advice and reached out. I found and continue to find that with all things work-related, this advice really works. Even if you think that there is a slim chance of it amounting to anything, taking the action toward what you want is empowering, and then not dwelling on what you can't control, i.e. the outcome of having taken that action, is freeing and calming.
If the outcome isn't what you thought you wanted, that's when you (I) can paint a bunch of scenarios in your head about how horribly things would have turned out if you had gotten that job or that part in the musical or that new client or whatever. In other words, trust that the right thing happened. Now I think I'm really overexplaining this very basic concept. Use it if it works for you, and let me know how it feels. OK, moving right along.
I have some answers to your questions from the comments of last week's Open Thread. And here they are:
- When even reader-since-day-one @Brooklynbee wasn't able to find last week’s Open Thread (and the traffic on it initially was really low, so I figured she probably wasn't the only one), I knew something was messed up. Basically, our new layout hid it from most mobile readers. Now it's in a spot where you can see it again. One still-bizarre thing about this layout is that there is this little hidden promotion spot for a story for those folks who swipe all the way to the right of the big images at the top of the main scroll. If you have any ideas for something subversive we could do with that extra little hidden homepage spot, let me know in the comments.
- We fixed the scroll so now you can see all of our stories in reverse chronological order, which is something a lot of you understandably wanted back. Thanks for all the great input on that issue.
- UTI update! UTI update! Following advice from some of you guys (the few who didn't think I was a real idiot for not just getting to a doctor and taking antibiotics), I drank a ton of real cranberry juice, ate blueberries, drank apple cider vinegar and tons of water, took probiotics, and, after two days, the "UTI" was totally gone. So maybe it wasn't in fact a UTI?
- Now, here (in continued bullet-point format for no discernible reason) are your weekly random questions. Use them as a jumping-off point for all the commenting you’ll be doing this weekend, ignore them and ask each other even better more-random or less-random questions, or copy and paste them into the comments with the question marks in different places, totally shifting the meaning of them. They’re all yours to do with what you want.
- Are you excited or anti-excited about the Olympics, and did you ever think, as a kid, you might compete in them?
- Would you rather watch the entire first season of Stranger Things in one sitting or Suicide Squad on opening night in a crowd of high school kids?
- When was the last time your hands were sticky?
- Do you think the scrutiny heaped on Melania Trump is fair? Unfair?
- Is your second toe longer than your big toe?
- What's the first thing you do when you feel a headache coming on?
- Have you ever been banned from something?
Open Thread is now open. Be as open as you want to be here in the comments, over and over again and all weekend long. Express yourself in any language, in song lyrics, GIFs, or riddles. Tell each other how your parents are doing, what you wish you were doing for work, and what's lacking or totally great in your sex life. I think that, a lot of the time, people lurk in the comments because they're afraid of being called out or being rejected or being ignored. BUT in this thread, you almost always get an answer or feedback or advice or at the very least an upvote or downvote.
You could meet a neighbor or a fellow fanboy (or girl), or find a shoulder to lean or cry on. There are answers, advice, and upvotes waiting for you down below. There's nothing to be scared of. There's nothing you can say that's wrong. Welcome to Open Thread. You're already the best part of it.