You Are The Advice Columnist: My Cousin Invited Everyone Else to the Wedding

I feel like not sending any acknowledgement of their marriage will be rude. Do I rise above the snub?

Jun 25, 2014 at 6:30pm | Leave a comment



My cousin (whose family lives in another state) got engaged shortly after my fiancé and I got engaged. We sent them a save-the-date card. I never heard anything about his wedding after the initial engagement announcement (on Facebook of course), but then I started seeing his save-the-date cards at the homes of other family members. Turns out, he's inviting all of my other aunts, uncles, and cousins, except for me and my immediate family.

I do think it's a little weird that he's excluding us (especially not even just inviting my mom and dad if he has limited space), but that isn't the issue. His wedding is exactly a month before mine, and obviously I KNOW that he is getting married despite not being invited, and he is invited to mine (I don't know if he will actually come). Am I supposed to still send him a card/gift? If this was a casual acquaintance or some more distant family member that didn't invite me to their wedding, I would know that I'm not obligated to send anything. But my family is fairly close (or we keep up the appearances of being close, anyway), everyone else in the family is going, and he's invited to my wedding. I feel like not sending any acknowledgement of their marriage will be rude, even though I feel like he was kind of rude in excluding my family in the first place. Do I rise above it and send something anyway? Just a card? Help!

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