YOU ARE THE ADVICE COLUMNIST: I'm A Trans Man Who Loves Dresses

Should I just accept that there are certain things I have to give up to be trans?

Feb 25, 2014 at 6:30pm | Leave a comment

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I have a very stereotypically female body, especially when it comes to curves, but I identify as male. I came out to my friends and family a couple months ago and it's gone surprisingly smoothly. I've gotten a bit better at passing, mainly by changing my clothing and my voice, but a tiny part of me wants to wear dresses and skirts still. 
I don't think that wearing something "feminine" means that a person identifies as either gender, but to a lot of the world, it does. I want to embrace all the sides of me, including the side that is giggly and wears pretty things, but I don't know how to do that and still have people believe that I was born in the wrong body. 
This is especially hard when I go out in public and have to deal with people I don't know. At restaurants and clothing stores it kills me to be called ma'am and she, but I don't know whether it's appropriate to mention my gender there, and even if it was, how I would go about it. This makes it really easy to just go for the baggy jeans and not talk much, but it also makes me feel like I'm only half of who I am. Should I just accept that there are certain things I have to give up to be trans?

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