Making your relationship public can be a total nightmare. My last boyfriend was obsessed with sharing every detail of his life and the constant scrutiny was tiring. I don’t live my life privately by any means, but I also don't broadcast my close relationships because hearing strangers' thoughtless commentary is annoying and pointless.
Saying the word “boyfriend” on my Twitter or Instagram elicits the most heinous responses from (mostly) men who are fans of my radio-show-having ex-boyfriend from a few years ago. Men I have dated in the past few years have dealt with non-stop harassment from these fans. I’m afraid of talking about who my current man is, or even family, because I know some woman-hating monster will go out of their way to say something awful to them. I don’t want my loved ones hearing all this pointless garbage.Every time my ex retweets me or comments on my Instagram, it opens the flood gates for all his degenerate fans to come out and call me an ugly whore. We broke up 2 years ago. That’s a REALLY long time -- you’d think they’d have forgotten about me or moved on to harass someone else. These people literally have nothing other to do than call me a c**t.I have blocked 256 Twitter accounts. Each one of those accounts said something so horrible to me that I didn’t want to see it ever again. I can take criticism, but when someone is just outright mean and disgusting, I don’t want to see it.
I recently did an interview for another site about people having Twitter armies who support them and attack their haters (which was never posted), and during the call I was asked about my ex, Anthony. We've had our differences, and I've said some awful things about him, but it's been resolved in the past few years and I have no ill will toward him. I said he treated me well while we were together, and most people assume he is scum because of his radio persona, but overall he's not as terrible as everyone thinks. The interviewer told me Anthony called her a c**t on his show for something she wrote.
I didn't really know what to say and had no idea what the context was, so I said, "Ummm, sorry?"
She said, "Yeah, well, he did."
Then there was an awkward pause. The rest of the interview felt like she was annoyed at me. Now that I'm writing a whole post complaining about being called names, I feel kind of bad for not being more empathetic. I really am sorry that he called her a c**t, and I certainly know how it feels.
Here's a fraction of what I deal with relating to my break-up with Anthony:
The "savages" comment was referring to a picture I posted of myself with two black basketball players. Racism is hilarious, right?!? Ugh, die.
These tweets are from the past few months. I especially like the person calling me a buck-tooth model. Doesn't bring back any memories of mean boys making fun of my teeth and calling me rat-face before I got braces.
"Get breast cancer bitch." OK, let me call a scientist to see if I can alter my DNA to include the mutated gene that is known for causing breast cancer. Should be pretty easy.
One of my all-time favorite tweets is from two months ago when I wrote about the alleged rapist Curtis Lepore:
Yes, I'm so very angry that I did not get raped by a "Vine" star who plea bargained to a charge of assault.
Luckily, this is something I've learned to tune out. It took a while, but most of the comments are easily laughed off. Still, hearing how awful you are daily can't be good for anyone's self-esteem. Waking up to a Facebook message that says, "You are an ugly piece of garbage and I hope you die," wasn't happening before the Internet. It's the non-stop access to anyone who has a social media profile that makes the harassment incessant.
I wish I had an answer on how to get rid of these trolls, but I can't stop people from creating Twitter accounts just to say awful things to me (this has happened more times than I can remember). Why? What's the point? I really honestly don't get why people do this. I have no desire to comment with "You're a stupid bitch!" on people's articles, Facebook posts, or tweets, no matter how much I disagree with or hate them.
Sometimes I wonder how much better my self-esteem and confidence would be if I wasn't exposed to these negative comments. I'm curious how it would affect my depression and anxiety as well,
PS: I found this picture of my buck-teeth: