Can We Make a Workout Mix That Doesn't Totally Suck?

In general, songs about clubbing and ex boyfriends makes me want to fill my ears with gum.

Sep 17, 2012 at 5:00pm | Leave a comment

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Yeah, that's Night Ranger.

Is there anything less punk rock than jogging?

Well, OK. Maybe. Margarine. Velour. Peanut allergies. The name "Justin." Just off the top of my head.

But it's hard to imagine, say, Siouxie Sioux in a zumba class. (But go ahead! Try it. Why not? It's free fun.)

While pop music is all about like, the importance of dancing out your feelings and gyrating your way to self-actualization, real ass rock shit has never been too concerned about health. I mean, I guess Propaghandi are vegetarians or whatever, but you never hear them at the gym. But for working out, top forty radio hits just don't really do it for me. Pretty people singing about how great they feel and how wonderful it is to be young and alive? I mean, I guess that a song about essential hypertension wouldn't really blow up the iTunes charts, but I don't reallly need to be negged by some twangy British imp who's singing about how confident that she could have her boyfriend back at any time. Wow, good for you, British imp. You really took my mind off my arm flaps.

Don't get me wrong -- I don't hate pop music. I think that new Taylor Swift song is fun if you shout all of the "talking" parts in the creepy voice of your choosing (I like Buffalo Bill or drunk Huckleberry Hound, personally, but let your spirit guide you). But in general, songs about clubbing and ex boyfriends makes me want to fill my ears with gum. It's just not my steelo.

I ask this of you guys because I just started running on the regular and oh my God, does it suck. I really, really want to be one of those people that LOVES it and does it in the rain and on vacation and sees it as the only form of meditation that makes your ass look good, but right now I just sort of pant and grunt and worry about whether or not people are looking at me.

So the solution is obviously to have a super-motivational workout mix, but all the internet seems to offer is the same kind of poppy radio hit stuff. Is it possible that there are good workout songs that wouldn't get radio play? PERHAPS YOU KNOW OF SOME? PERHAPS YOU WOULD LIKE TO SHARE THEM WITH ME?

Especially since my trainer gent said that I should treat this Labor Day like New Year's and really use it to re-commit to a running routine. (I do not think that his New Year's and mine are very much alike.)

So what am I putting on my workout mix? I don't want to fence you in, but I'm especially looking for that sweet spot of uptempo and borderline antisocial that makes for a good breakup song. You guys are way cooler than me… if you help me put together something cool, I promise to French kiss you each individually.