What's The Weirdest Thing In Your House?

For me, it's a butt. With tentacles.

Jul 13, 2014 at 9:00am | Leave a comment

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Octobuns.

I wound up sending this picture to Somer to during the course of a conversation about the weird things in our respective living rooms.

Putting the giant octopus on the mannequin butt seemed like a good idea at the time! And, honestly, it still seems like a good idea. 

It sits on the hearth (the fireplace is full of lava lamps because FLORIDA) and it's such a part of the everyday scene that I don't even realize it's there most of the time.

Many several years ago (which means I don't even remember when, just that it was long ago enough to feel like forever), I was at someone's house. I didn't know them -- I was there with friends who maybe knew this person? I don't know if I was even sure at the time!

It was the middle of the night -- and all of this also made sense back then.

At any rate, this stranger had a silver mannequin butt dressed in a thong with a fortune cookie on it. I admired it, as one does, and then the details get fuzzy.

I ended up owning the mannequin butt.

So I painted it because the silver was looking pretty rough, and I lost the fortune cookie thong because it just didn't seem to be the right style for my decor.

And it's had a prominent place in every living room I've had since.

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Silver pecs.

There are a couple of other mannequins in the living room -- but not the foam ones that look like real people. I've got a late-’90s Lane Bryant metal woman form that is basically a big clothes hanger on a stand with some figure details filled in. And I've got a big -- and heavy -- silver metal torso from Structure. 

Remember that mall store Structure? They sold dude clothes and I guess it was cool. They threw this mannequin out and I actually snagged it from the dumpster at the mall.

And then carried it home on the city bus.

That got some looks. But it worked out pretty great because, hey, instant sculpture, right?

What about you, weekenders? What's the weirdest thing in your house?