In the past 12 months, I have been to Disneyworld at least 10 times.
I only live an hour-and-a-half away from the Magic Kingdom, so I can make it there and back in a day, if I wish. I usually like to stay the night though, so I can get drunk at Epcot. Sean and I have annual passes, which is beyond awesome. This allows us to be more leisurely with our time, as we know we can always come back.
Space Mountain down? No problem, see you in a couple of weeks. There are never rides that I feel like I have to do for this reason. But, there are certain consumables that I must put in my body EVERY time I am there.
One of these is Dole Pineapple Whip, aka The Edible Smile of God. The other is the Grey Goose Slush, aka one of the reasons I always end up drunk at Epcot.
Drunk in the Japanese section of Epcot.
Even though I live relatively close to Celebration
, I can’t just pop up there if I get a 3 AM Pineapple Whip craving (but what a life that would be!). But I realize that I am super lucky. What about the folks who have to buy plane tickets to get to Mickey or those who have never been? For you my friends, I have rounded up four recipes that are almost identical (or at least very close) to some of my favorite Disney treats.
We’ll begin with a beverage.
As I mentioned earlier, I simply must consume one of these whenever I am in Orlando. It’s delicious and refreshing, and since I live in the land of perpetual summer, it’s also a good way to cool down. I know alcohol dehydrates and that I should be responsible and drink water or something, but water is boring. Have you tasted water?
Slut tights go especially well with slushes.
We were first introduced to this concoction on our Honeymoon. We were hanging out at the Rose & Crown in Epcot England and an off-duty cast member clued us in to its existence. I don’t remember his name, but I remember his kindness, and I remember his job was to sing at people while they were eating. He was pretty cool.
This slush was pretty easy to reproduce. It’s basically 2 parts Grey Goose Citron Vodka+ 2 parts Sweet & Sour mix + 1 part Simple Syrup = My face is super happy. I made my own Sweet & Sour mix because that is also super easy! It’s just equal parts simple syrup, lime juice, and lemon juice. Put in mason jar, store in fridge. People will be impressed you made your own Sweet & Sour mix. They will be so impressed, that they will want to do sex with you, probably all the different ways.
Once you have everything measured, blend with frozen water.
A benefit of making this yourself is that you can use real glassware.
Did you guys know that there is a website
dedicated to all the alcohol at all the theme parks in Orlando? Magical.
How does it compare? Pretty flawlessly, actually. This tasted pretty much exactly like the one I get at the park.
This is one of those delicacies that only makes an appearance at the Epcot Food & Wine Festival, which is my favorite thing in the world. Last year, Sean and I went
, and we won so hard. They give you a passport, and you get a stamp for each “destination” in which you purchase a consumable.
We got all the stamps. We are kind of super impressive. And yeah, I know they got all our money but I got to eat snails and a lobster roll that day so who is the real winner here?
A challenge was never more accepted.
The second thing I put in my body that day (the first was beer) was this amazingly melty, greasy, honey-covered piece of cheese.
Guys, if I had known this was so flippin’ easy, I would consume a lot more cheese than I already consume. So, it’s actually not that great that I know this now.
But really you just fry both sides of the cheese (kasseri) and drizzle honey on it. Top with toasted pistachios, unless you have a nut allergy.
What? YES. This is amazing.
So, what do I reckon? This is pretty close to what I had at the fest. The cheese I purchased seemed to be a little more pungent, but I’m super into that kinda thing. So, this was a success.
Let’s carry on.
I have never actually had this at Le Cellier because I have never actually been to Le Cellier. I just love the French Restaurant so much that I always eat there. I mean, LOOK at this charcuterie plate!
I LOVE a charcuterie plate!
But anyway, I had this soup at the EF&WF and it was fiiiiiine. Several people have raved about it to me though, so maybe it was an off batch? I decided to see if the at home version worked out better.
Maybe it was the polystyrene?
It did, it worked out better. It worked out deliciously. I apologize for the lack of pictures, but I was super hungover so I couldn’t deal with cooking and taking pictures at the same time.
This is a picture from the night before, just so you understand.
Meet Jimothy, my drinking deer.
Here is the final (soup) product:
Well? Guys, if you like cheese and if you like taste, you will love this recipe. Make it. Eat it. Be delirious with happiness.
Now we move on to that edible smile I was talking about earlier…
This is my favorite thing in all of the parks. I love it so much. It is creamy without being heavy, sweet without being cloying, and just acidic enough to be perfect summer treat.
An awesome moment that my husband was able to capture.
I just fucking love it.
Lesley (who also loves Disneyworld
) and I had some major twitter bonding moments over Dole Pineapple Whip and I promised to tell her how this turned out. We will get back to that.
The instructions are pretty easy to follow. Lots of blending, and some folding, but nothing too difficult. Blending and folding are a small price to pay for something so divine.
Gently, like you’re petting a butterfly.
But what did I tell Lesley?
I told her that though the flavors are all there, the texture is not quite right. It’s a little too icy; not smooth enough. Does this make it not delicious? No, it is delicious. It is just not my perfect Pineapple Whip. Am I going to eat it? Of course, let’s not be rash. It will do in a pinch. But if you want the real deal…
Get thee to Disneyworld.
Tweet Claire with your favorite Disney foods! Or tweet her tasteful nudes, she’s not picky! @clairelizzie