A Self-Help Guide to Resisting Your Desire for Barbie Fashion In Your 20s

We have a 6-step program to help you resist the temptations of the new Barbie Moschino line.
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We have a 6-step program to help you resist the temptations of the new Barbie Moschino line.

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We know you’re swooning over the recently released Moschino Barbie stuff. We’re sure you genuinely believe that a new Barbie sweatshirt will improve your life. You are so adorable sometimes. But you’re a grown-up, remember? That’s why you’ve come to this post. You need to quiet the little voice inside begging for some new Barbie toys you’ve been feeling since the Milan show. Because this Barbie thing, it’s just a phase. As luck would have it, we have a 6-step program to help you resist the temptations of the new Barbie Moschino line.

1. Remember Her:

There were days when you might sit with Barbie for long stretches, having all kinds of fun. Then you lost one of their bubblegum pink high heels, and you immediately understood that life would not always be this simple. She taught you time-tested lessons about optimism, permanent smiles, and shaving really well. Take some time to think about your Barbie childhood and what a great time you had together.

2. Reality Check:

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Even if your child therapist told you that like you, Barbie was also a joiner, you have new real, friends now and you have to move on. Playing with Barbie fashion at this age would be a dangerous game marked by delusions of grandeur and a ridiculous amount of Barbie professions. You have a one job now, and you can’t wear your expensive Barbie t-shirt there. Yes, dressing like her would be awesome, but you need to buy clothes you can wear to meetings. You know you should have gotten your obsession with a hot pink heart-shaped clutch studded with pearls out of your system before 5th grade.

3. Anger:

You see someone wearing a Barbie thing, and you are seriously angry. It’s the same exact kind of fury you felt when the girl with the huge collection of Barbies said, “you’re my best friend.” But then you realized she was talking to Skipper, and so you gave all her Barbies haircuts as revenge, which is why you had to play with imaginary friends a while. Take deep breaths, and imagine yourself looking smart, capable, and mature, in a sage colored cardigan.

4. Healthy Distractions:

Try less loud shades of pink, or getting the pink in with a fun grey scarf. Just be age-appropriate and remember how strong you are without Barbie fashion.

5. Acceptance: 

Invest in a nice black sweater. It will carry you through the cold season. It should not say Barbie on it.

6. Falling Off the Wagon

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If you have a slip-up and buy eight neon purple mirror phone cases for your friends, go back to step #2 and list the reasons why you’re doing this.

Reprinted with permission from Styleite