Slutty life skills

Picking your nail polish off in the shower is completely healthy and normal isn’t it? As is going to bed in your make-up, dabbing the smudgy bits the next morning and headin’ out the door – in fact, it looks really rather good, doesn't it?
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Publish date:
May 31, 2012
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Tags:
grooming, cheap beauty tricks, lazy beauty tips

By which I mean the traditional English definition of slut, as in “a slovenly woman” or, as the Oxford Dictionary puts it: "dated - a woman with low standards of cleanliness" - that’s what I’m talking about

Who hasn’t shaved just the portion of leg that’s revealed by their cropped trousers, with a dry razor, and no foam because they woke up ten minutes before they had to leave the house? I have a friend who actively relishes the days when she has greasy hair because they allow her to bung in some dry shampoo and construct the best beehives I’ve ever seen.

Picking your nail polish off in the shower is completely healthy and normal isn’t it? As is going to bed in your make-up, dabbing the smudgy bits the next morning and headin’ out the door – in fact, it looks really rather good, doesn't it?

xoJaneUK contributer Amy writes, "I HATE when my skin looks greasy, so I use those MAC Blotting Papers that you press against your face and grimace at the oil spill they've removed. In a pinch, Rizla work really well too. The King Size ones make excellent blotting papers and your stoner friends will worship you for always being prepared."

Rizlas as cheapo blotting papers - I love this.

There are also boy sluts, my favourite literary one being Holden Caulfield’s schoolmate in The Catcher in the Rye. “Stradlater was more of a secret slob. He always looked alright, Stradlater, but for instance, you should’ve seen the razor he shaved himself with. It was always rusty as hell and full of lather and hairs and crap. He never cleaned it or anything. He always looked good when he finished fixing himself up, but he was a secret slob anyway, if you knew him the way I did.”

These are my – I mean my friends' – slutty life skills. Now I want to know yours. Come on, confess to me the lazy, dirty, disgusting things that you do to sneakily achieve a glamorous, groomed appearance. Let’s share!