NO, PSYCHIATRIC NURSE, I DID NOT NOD OFF INTO MY FRUIT JUICE: My Mental Hospital Hair Secret For Subtle Punky-Pretty Pink Streaks

WELL. Let me start this off with yet ANOTHER hair-related story about my time in the loony bin! See, this is the aftermath of beauty editors gone mad: nervous breakdowns and beauty ideas are kookily entertwined forever more, like the red rose and the briar in that spooky song I was forced to sing every summer at this hillbilly sleepaway camp I was sent to in the mountains of West Virginia (fine, it was a posh retreat for rich horseback-riding girls, but whatever).

ANYWAY. Back to mental hospital hair! WELL, when I went into the bin for the first of two stints I did in 2010 … No, wait, this was when I was committed in the fall of 2009, because I was there for Halloween and there was this crazy party where all the catatonics sat around eating Doritos and listening to “Monster Mash.” Oh, the stories I have yet to tell here on xojane.com! You gotta keep reading.

ANYWAY AGAIN. When I was admitted in the fall of 2009 to Payne-Whitney Manhattan -- this is the same stint I wrote about in “I Spent Two Weeks In A Mental Institution But I Left With Better Hair" -- I had the same pink streaks as in my hair above. I was admitted in the middle of the night after completely losing it; long story.

Anyway for the third time, after three meals that first day, a nurse marched me into the nursing station and accused me of dipping my hair in the little cups of fruit juice we got on our trays in the dining room! I said no, m'aam, it was just a beauty product.

She said was I sure I wasn't drowsing off during meals and letting my hair fall into the fruit juice just so. I "No, maam"'d her again (I'm my Southern grandmother's granddaughter, after all), but she still gave me the sideeye at every meal she supervised from then on.

What HAD made my hair so subtly (she hadn't noticed the color the first night I was admitted, see -- hence her suspicions -- because the pink pieces were so hideable and blended in with the rest of my blonde) pink-streaked? An ingenious little product called STREEKERS, that's what:

They are semi-permanent colors that you paint on your hair, and then they wash right out! I'm wearing the "pink" shade above; durr. I LOVE THEM SOOO MUCH. You can also just paint the tips of your hair, like Kate Bosworth is doing MOST fiercely right now, amongst other people. I also love this classic Kate Moss by Juergen Teller image/look from back in the day:

Each shade is only $11 online and unless you're a professional Harajuku girl or something, one little bottle should last you like forever. The shades are really, REALLY vivid, the more bleached out your hair is!

And the obvious question is: will this show up on my hair? Light-ish brown-haired girls and anyone lighter: yes. If you have dark hair with light highlights, paint the highlights. If you're blonde like me, great. Brunettes can always buy a little box kit like L'Oreal Paris 01 Superior Preference Blonde Platinum dye and lighten a few TINY streaks using a mascara wand, then use the streekers over that. Don't go crazy with the home bleaching, PLEASE! (Shudder.)

So, you like? And do you have any good nervous breakdown stories? I love all your comments and always try to answer them all (I ALWAYS read every single one, please know) -- GO!