Too Faced Decided That, Actually, $1.4 Billion Is Better Than Sex

Also in this week's beauty news, the most iconic beauty in the world will probably make you go, "Really? Her?"
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Publish date:
November 16, 2016
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mac, Too Faced, marc jacobs, beauty icons, Cara Delevigne, cara delevingne, estee lauder, Mariah Carey

Guys, I'm sick. That's the news — that's it.

Just kidding. But you know what is news (to me)? Apparently, chewing raw garlic is a cold remedy — or at least made me feel like I had less of a cold for a little while. My breath smells like perpetual pizza, but honestly, I don't hate it.

And now for topics other than the compromised state of my immune system...

For whatever reason, people still like ranking famous women in order of hotness

Here's a thing that made me go "Huh?" A cosmetics brand, NKDb, did a poll of 1000 Brits between 18 and 65 to ask who they thought the "most iconic beauty of the last century" is. Yeah, you're probably thinking Marilyn Monroe or Elizabeth Taylor and Audrey Hepburn because that's who everyone seems to think of when "world-famous beauties" comes to mind (in the western world, anyway). Sure, they're all good-lookin' ladies. And they are on this dumb list, HOWEVER.

Ranked in descending order of hotness in a totally relevant and not at all sexist poll that no one really asked for:

  1. Cara Delevingne
  2. Marilyn Monroe
  3. Kim Kardashian
  4. Audrey Hepburn
  5. Twiggy
  6. Elizabeth Taylor
  7. Kylie Jenner
  8. Dita Von Teese
  9. Gwen Stefani
  10. Adele

Take a look at that and your thoughts might go a little something like mine, which were Cara? Really? I mean, I like Cara D but #1, really? followed by Hm... so a bunch of white ladies and Kim Kardashian, big surprise.

I would rank most reasonable quote from this article as:

Paula Warrender, 31, of Luton, Beds, said: "I don't see how Cara can beat Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn — it's totally crazy, they were both complete and utter style icons, whereas Cara just has eyebrows like Liam Gallagher."

Paula, cool it on the eyebrow bashing, but otherwise I see how you could be confused.

*To the tune of that Smiths song* Cast me, cast me, cast me...

Does anyone remember that #castmemarc hashtag that the Marc Jacobs teams was using to scout eager Instagram users to model in his stuff? Well, he's doing it again, but this time for a beauty vlogger, and this time you really gotta work for it. Instead of just hashtagging your best selfies, you are required to do an Instagram video and essentially tell the Marc Jacobs team why you're so authentic and original and worthy of being in a Marc Jacobs ad as you broadcast your thirst to your followers. Oh, and don't forget to hashtag.

No shade to the folks who participate — I just feel like talent scouting is getting so... personal. I imagine they're just going to cast who they think has "the look" regardless of how much they can prove their authenticity, whatever that means (honestly that word gets thrown around so much it has literally lost all meaning and I can only really fathom meta-authenticity, which would be whatever one broadcasts on social media, seemingly). Whatever happened to scouting teen girls in malls? Do they still do that?

Oh yeah and if you get picked or whatever, you get flown to NYC to attend a casting wherein you shall possibly be granted the ability to record a makeup application video for MJ and his team. Good luck!

Estée Lauder just offered Too Faced an amount of money that is, indeed, better than sex

And apparently it's the most expensive acquisition in Estée Lauder histoire at $1.4 BILLION doll hairs. Just think about how many Chocolate Palettes that is... it's a lot. Too Faced's cofounder, Jerrod Blandino, says that they'll keep everything cruelty-free with no animal testing and essentially all operations will be the same, aside from where their checks from come.

It seems to be a move to really get in there, in terms of the generation Z and millennial market, which is what anyone seems to care about in terms of profitable beauty markets.

The "average" woman's daily beauty routine has 27 steps according to yet another poll.

So a study conducted by Superdrug in the UK found that women on average have 27 steps in their DAILY beauty routine — and while they tout the Kardashians and contouring as the "culprit" (seems a bit shame-y, no?) what exactly constitutes a "step" here?

Is this a totally surprising thing? Or maybe it's a UK thing? I don't know. Either people in this study really laid it on, or maybe I'm just really far behind on my daily beauty routine. Though, it seems a bit dismissive to me that "selfies" are the reason. What are the odds their study consisted of women with beauty-focused Instagram accounts or beauty vlogs, hmm?

Mariah Carey hit re-do on her MAC collection

Not to say that Mariah's debut MAC collection was bad — just that it was pretty meh for the diva, Mimi. Maybe it's a holiday thing, but damn if she didn't make up for it! First of all the packaging is all kinds of glittery. Check. The Skinfinish compact has Mariah's face on it. Check. The lipstick bullets have butterflies embossed in them (probably my fave Mariah Album other than Fantasy and the Christmas one). Check. All things I actually and truly want.

The collection will be available December 15th at MAC stores and online. There are five lipsticks in frost and Cremesheen finishes, five Lipglasses, two lip pencils, two eyeshadow quads, a liquid liner, two sets of lashes (obviously), a gold shimmer Skinfinish, two blushes, loose powder and two brushes. It's pretty much a whole LOOK (minus foundation/concealer).

  • Does anyone care when big cosmetics companies buy slightly smaller but also still very profitable cosmetics brands?
  • How do you feel about that weird "most iconic beauty" ranking? Really, her?
  • Did you have anything from Mariah's first MAC collection?
  • How many steps are in your beauty routine?