NEW STUDY SAYS CHICKS CHOOSE LOVE OVER MONEY; DUH. Plus: THERE'S A PERFUME FOR THAT

If there's one thing I wish I could do, it's bone dudes for money.

Jun 23, 2011 at 10:02am | Leave a comment

Continuing the trend of money-talk here on xojane.com: according to the New York Post, a new study by ForbesWoman with the website YourTango.com reports that more than 91 percent of single women said they would marry for love over money. To which we all say, "Durrrr" -- right?! Honestly ladies, have you REALLY ever chosen money over love? Really really? If so -- and hopefully you know by now what I'm going to say here -- no judgment. At ALL. If anything, "RESPEK!", as Ali G. would put it.

Because if there's one thing I wish I could do, it's bone dudes for money. Yup: I cannot, and it is tres unfortunate. Here's what I can try to do: date really rich guys because I think that it is in my best interest to at least attempt to do so, get really bored with them and then totally into a non-rich guy behind their backs, and callously dump said rich guys in favor of non-rich guys with whom I have more in common. Sad but true.

So it is sad to be a rich guy? I guess that's the question. Nah -- they'll live. Sure they get used, but I mean, women get "used" all the time and we're not babies; at the end of the day, there are worst crimes against humanity, and we can deal with it.  It's NOTHING personal about the wealthy men, it's just that I've found that I don't really date my type when I date rich, and if you're nodding your head I'm sure you can relate! I don't pretend to know our readers' deals through and through, but I'm not the beauty editor for Town and Country here (though OMFG, can you imagine?). I'm a beauty and health editor for xojane.com, a site helmed by a prank-loving feminist editor who taught us to make dresses out of pillowcases and put Kurt and Courtney on the cover of her teen magazine.

No, Jane's not exactly a Wall Street type, and what I'm saying is that if you're on this site reading everything, you probably aren't either. You're vaguely creative-brained, and dating a rich but boring-to-you and money-centric guy just for the perks or whatever isn't WORTH IT. You choose love! I do too. Well, I choose sex with more creative guys, and more often than not these guys are not rolling in money. Are there creative rich guys? Yes. You know what, sure, because they have to be creative a lot of the time to make money. (Maybe I mean artistic-temperament guys, and no, there aren't that many of them who have gotten rich. There aren't!)

Let me tell you the cologne that rich guys should wear to attract the OTHER nine percent of women out there who would choose money (and again, remember that we don't hate on them -- just more hot broke guys for us, no?). It's called MONEY, it was created by a Microsoft Vice President of Sales named Patrick McCarthy (get 'im, girls), and it ironically costs a mere $35, much less than actually being rich.

The men’s scent, His Money Cologne, fuses “the woody aroma of newly printed money with a bold fusion of fresh ocean breezes"; the women's fragrance, "Her Money Eau de Parfum" similarly features "the clean scent of freshly minted bills" but also grapefruit, freesia and melon. The way to wear this is to splash this stuff on and see what kind of sexy, hungry weirdos you attract, then use THEM! It's only fair, and you don't even need to be rich to do it.

That said, do you date rich guys (or girls)? Why or why not? Have you in the past? Let's go.