Oh, don't pretend like you don't have one!
I know y'all are out there looking fierce and flawless pretty much 24/7, but sometimes--sometimes--mistakes happen. Mishaps, faux pas, whatever you want to call them. The point is that they happen to the best of us. I'm sharing eight of mine, and I request your attendance at this party of lamentations.
Tear-Inducing Dye Job
OK, so once upon a time, many years ago, I decided to take my hair from blonde to deep red. Frugal foot forward, I opted to do this in my own home with a box kit, and enlisted my mother as Dye Woman. About two hours later, the job was done... Only it wasn’t completely done. My hair was spotted with red instead of being evenly dyed, which hurled me into a state of full blown panic.
I should note that I cannot blame my mother for this mishap. My hair is super-thick and was even longer back then, so reaching every single strand with a single box kit wasn't feasible. Plus, drastic changes like that are better suited for the salon. SERIOUSLY.
Anyway, I panicked for about 24 hours, tears were shed in the solitude of a bathroom, and an appointment at a local salon was made ASAP. I remained in hiding until the day of the fix (you should have seen the stylist’s face, which only furthered my distress). Several hours and $150 later, I had the prettiest strawberry blonde hair you’ve ever seen. I actually kept the strawberry blonde thing up for a while.
Please don’t tell me I’m the only one who’s dabbed on a bit of concealer and then completely forgot to blend it in, thereby drawing attention to the one thing I was trying to hide.
I know, I know. A girl ought to blend immediately, but I like the formula to get a little tacky before I go in with my brush. I’ve only forgotten to blend once, but it was possibly the least opportune time for me to have done so.
You see, I was at an audition, nervous as you’d expect, when the girl next to me leaned over and said, “Did you mean to blend that in?” Of course I meant to! Anyway, I rubbed the concealer into my skin faster than it takes a musician to get through a hemidemisemiquaver, then stood up to do my thing. Nailed the audition, by the way.
Rubbing Your Cat-Eye
Ugh! This is the worst, and I know I'm not alone! Who else painstakingly applies their liquid liner and then, without thinking, goes in for the ol' eye rub? And it's funny, because the second you do it, you realize the mistake you've made. My accidental, black, smudgy eye is usually followed by an exasperated sigh an an internal "Not again!" groan. This is why I carry my liquid liner with me.
Forgetting to Rinse Deep Conditioner
So I'm in the shower, taking care of business, shaving my legs, doing a jig, exfoliating my face and lathering up body wash. You know–the things you do things while waiting for your deep conditioner to set. Only sometimes I’ll do all these things and then turn off the shower, towel up, start to blow dry my hair and wonder why it feels so gross and sticky.
I am not going to lie to you: I have played the lazy card (so much effort to get back into the shower after you're dry, no?) and tried to just keep blow drying to see what would happen. "Maybe my hair will be extra shiny," I thought to myself. But no. Hair disaster is what happens, folks. Maybe I should just switch to a leave-in...
Forgetting the Second Brow
Eyebrows take work, gang. And yeah, there’s the whole “sisters, not twins” mantra every beauty blogger repeats whenever talking about filling in and shaping brows. However, finishing one eyebrow and completely forgetting the other is a whole different (eye)ball game, and it usually earns you strange looks from passers-by.
I don’t drastically alter the shape or color of my brows, but only doing one creates a hard-to-put-your-finger-on-it lopsidedness. I’m guilty of this one several times over. I don’t even know how it happens, so don’t ask.
The Dreaded Lipstick Ring
Have you ever carefully applied your favorite lipstick, gone out for a few hours, and then realized you have a ring of lipstick on the perimeter of your lips, but no color in the center? GUILTY.
I’m usually hyper-aware of this now, to the point that I’ll obnoxiously check my reflection over and over again. And fact: you can prevent “the ring” from happening by applying lip liner, then lipstick, then blotting, then applying the lipstick again. Try it!
Finishing Powder Flashback
The first time finishing powder flashback happened to me, I had no idea what was going on. I'd taken a picture with a friend, at night and with a flash, and couldn't understand what the white splotches on my face were. The culprit, as you probably know, was a poorly milled finishing powder. Stick to the good stuff, babes. It's so worth it!
Waiting Too Long to Remove Your Mask
I do this way, way, way too often, and it doesn't really matter what kind of mask I'm doing, either. While the super-duper-moisturizing masks are OK to leave on for extended periods, the harsher face masks utilizing acids and chemicals can wreak havoc.
For example, I was recently testing out an anti-wrinkle mask, which involved adhering sticky, C-shaped pads on the outer corner of my mouth and then a larger pad on my forehead. I left it on beyond the recommended time and was left with noticeable red blotches for hours. I had an event to go to that night and almost bailed, but the redness faded enough that I could even out my complexion with some heavier foundation.
I'm also guilty of doing this with clay masks and peels, which can also create redness. Sometimes you just lose track of time...
OK, your turn! GO!