It's gonna get sappy up in here.
Glossier is fast becoming one of those beauty brands that I have a really personal connection to. I’m not sure why. Maybe it’s because I’ve been using them since their launch. Maybe it's because their products are versatile and dependable, and I know I can reach for them in the clutch, or maybe it’s just because Glossier feels inclusive, like any of us could be a cool Glossier girl (all I’ve ever wanted to be is a cool girl, but the sad truth is I’m just a try-hard bitch).
Regardless, I get excited every time a new Glossier product is on the horizon. Their product launches feel like watching video premieres on TRL back in the day. You don’t always know what’s coming, but you know it’s going to be good.
You guys kept asking Glossier to make a cleanser, and finally, they have. It’s not the biggest shock since they’ve asked us numerous times over their social media what we’d want out of the perfect cleanser. Now, they’re giving us one.
Alright let's just get this out of the way. THAT NAAAME — Phew. Feel better? Me too. Moving on.
Milky Jelly is a gel cleanser that’s very gentle, but claims it’s powerful enough to dissolve makeup, even eyeliner and mascara.
It’s made with five skin conditioners to moisturize, and they replaced a quarter of the water content with rosewater to soothe and calm skin. My skin has been antsy lately, so I love that. The heavyweight cleansing agent is called poloxamer and is also used in contact solution, so it’s safe around your eyes and won’t irritate. Vitamin B is also included for another dose of moisture.
I kept going back to the makeup removal claim, though. Now, I’ve never found a Glossier product that doesn’t do exactly what it says. The Priming Moisturizer is always there when I need an uncomplicated moisturizer that’s gonna keep me hydrated without any unwanted sheen, and I ride for the Balm Dotcom. I would rather lose my keys than that balm.
Glossier products are very gentle, which is obviously great for your skin, but I tend to like my cleansers to pack a punch. Acids, exfoliants, you name it, give me all of them. Could this gentle cleanser really yank off all of my makeup in one wash?
To test it out, I wore as much makeup as I normally would if I was really going for it. Primer, foundation, two layers of foundation in favor of concealer in places that needed a little extra love, blush, highlight, mascara, and a setting powder. Then, I went about my normal day.
After about five hours of running errands and all that (to really let things settle), it was time to test out the Milky Jelly. For a normal cleansing, Glossier recommends applying it to wet skin. For makeup removal, they recommend applying Milky Jelly directly to dry skin.
Because I am incapable of doing what I’m told, I applied it to wet skin.
I applied about a pump to my forehead, each cheek, and around each eye to melt off mascara. Glossier does make it a point to say that MilkyJelly won’t work on waterproof mascara, so I made sure to not wear any. See? I can do something right.
Normally, when I wash my face, I use my Clarisonic, but I didn’t think that would a great way to test this, since the Clarisonic will pull anything off of your face with barely any effort on your part. Instead, I used these ancient tools, known as hands, to wash my face just like our ancestors did.
The makeup started to dissolve right off. My base and highlight were pulled right up, and the mascara started to loosen right away, leaving me looking like a sad, surrealist clown, which also happens to be my spring 2016 aesthetic.
I worked the cleanser into my face for about a minute and rinsed, surprised at how much had already been removed. I did apply one more pump to each eye to really melt that mascara off — you know how stubborn that shit can be. After just a few more seconds, all of that was gone, too. There were no remnants or stains from the mascara in my lash line or bottom lashes either, as there sometimes is when I take my makeup off (truthfully, I love that look, but it would kind of defeat the purpose of this article now wouldn’t it?).
So here's my face, my bare face, after one wash.
SO. It's been a minute since I've used a photo of myself with no makeup on. I like to at least cover up my dark circles, even out any redness, and trick you guys into thinking I'm perfect. But here you have the truth. See? I have a blemish. In addition to that blemish, I also have clean, makeup-free skin with not even one sign of a mascara stain.
Damn, they weren't kidding. Milky Jelly really does pull everything off, leaving you with fresh, moisturized skin.
It's also worth noting that, after I used this cleanser, I ran a quick errand without anything else on my face — not even a moisturizer (I'm an idiot) — and I noticed that my skin had a nice, glowy finish without any trace of oil or residue. I'm not saying you should use this or any other cleanser without moisturizer but I AM saying that, in my never ending quest for glowy, lit-from-within skin, this cleanser could be a great start. But you should always moisturize, jesus.
So what do you think? I know you guys love Glossier, and so do I. Have you tried Milky Jelly? What do you use to cleanse? I had been using that new bomb ass Bare Minerals skincare line, so I might work those back into the rotation, too. Tell me everything below!
Tynan is cleansing on Twitter @TynanBuck.