DOMINATRIX BEAUTY: How To Create a Face That Won't Sweat Off While Wearing Rubber in the Summer

Summer is coming, and while most people are telling you to ditch the dark colors and heavy stuff, I’m going to teach you to do heavy, dramatic, goth meets drag queen makeup that will last forever.

Jul 1, 2014 at 4:00pm | Leave a comment

Hello there ducklings, I’m Madeira Darling, professional dominatrix and wearer of makeup, and I’m here to tell you how to look like the glamorous bitch queen you’ve always dreamed of being.
 
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I do not have resting bitchface, I am resting bitchface.

 
Summer is coming, and while most people are telling you to ditch the dark colors and heavy stuff, I’m going to teach you to do heavy, dramatic, goth-meets-drag queen makeup that will last forever. (I’ve slept in this stuff, the next day, nothing had moved.) None of that “keep it to a bare minimum” stuff here, that look does not fly in my line of work.
 
Why should you trust me on this? Because inevitably, when it’s 90 degrees out, some clown wants me to wear a rubber (not a breathable material at all, FYI) outfit and give him a physically demanding beating and I have to do all this while looking absurdly glamorous. 
 
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For me these are work clothes.

 
Alrighty then, let’s do this thing.
 
For flawless skin, I lay down a base of primer. My personal fave is the super-sun protective, and grandiloquently named Sun Prise Cotton Touch Powder Cream. It’s a primer from the Korean Etude House brand and, it’s got a weird vaguely gritty texture that melts on the skin, leaving it gorgeous and velvety. I like it because it gives makeup grip and staying power and has SPF 50 (a necessity for me because I burn absurdly easily).
 
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I spread that all over my face with my finger tips (Does anyone apply primer with a brush? If you do, what brush, and who are you?).

 
After that I like to mix Face Atelier Ultra Foundation in zero with Dr. Jart+ Premium Beauty Balm to create a color that’s actually pale enough for my freakishly pale skin. I love the light texture of this mix. It feels like there’s literally nothing on my skin, but blemishes, freckles and evidence of my irregular sleep schedule all fade marvelously away. If I want heavier or more moisturizing coverage, I mix Hanskin BB Cream with llamasqua Skin Base Foundation in 0.
 
I especially love Illamasqua's Skin Base foundation, as it actually comes in a color pale enough for me, and it isn't as heavy or hard to blend as their Rich Liquid Foundation, which also tends to break me out. I really like this blend of foundations because it gives me great coverage with the easy blendability of a BB Cream. I vary the BB because Hanskin mixes better with the Illamasqua and Dr. Jart+ better with Face Atelier. I haven’t got the slightest idea why this works, but it does and you should totally trust me on this.
 
If you’re not ghostly pale, I’d recommend blending a custom foundation with part BB, part foundation of your choice. Both Illamasqua and Face Atelier offer a huge range of shades and blending options so you can get a truly perfect match.
 
I apply this either with my fingers or a makeup geek stippling brush, depending on my mood.
 
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Today I felt like fingers.

 
Next, I use a brush to pat on Amazing Cosmetics Amazing Concealer in Ivory in a triangle shape under my eyes, and anywhere that needs covering (for example zits, redness, hickeys). Not to sound like an awful sales pitch, but this is some seriously amazing concealer, it really does live up to its name. I am, as I mentioned, very pale. Being this pale means dark circles. I can go to bed at 8 p.m. and sleep like a baby and I will still have dark circles.
 
This concealer is OPAQUE. I've never met a concealer so opaque, and it blends beautifully, stays put and hides whatever you need it to. Yes, it is expensive, but a little of this stuff goes a long, long way. (I inevitably end up squeezing out a little too much and blending it down my neck to avoid wasting it). Nothing has ever covered so well, and I've tried many many concealers, from Jane Iredale, to Smashbox, to cheapie Covergirl sticks, ad infinitum. This is the only one that actually hides my under eye circles.
 
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If my husband weren’t so pretty I’d marry it.

 
Your concealer goes on after your liquid foundation because when you’re blending your foundation, you’re blending away your coverage, and then what’s the point of putting on concealer in the first place? However if you’re using a powder foundation (which I sometimes do if I’m feeling greasy), you should put your concealer on and then your powder foundation. Personally I love the indie brand Meow Cosmetics for their huge range of shades in a huge number of undertones. I like to buff mine on with a big ol’ kabuki brush. 
 
I like to wear cream blush under my regular blush because it makes it wear longer without fading. (The ones in the Balm Voyage palette are lovely and blend beautifully.) This is indicative of my general attitude toward makeup, which can be summarized as “How can I wear more of this? There has to be a way.”
 
After this, I powder using E.L.F Cosmetics HD Shimmer Powder. “But, Madeira, I’ll look cakey!” I hear you cry, and here, my darlings, is the secret: Apply your powder in layer: thin, thin layers. The other secret is that E.L.F.'s shimmer powder formulation is way less prone to caking than its non-shimmer counterpart. I have no idea why this is true, but it is.
 
Now if there is one thing you think when you think classic dominatrix it is CHEEKBONES (or maybe I’m weird and have a lot of Marlene Dietrich bondage fantasies). Now is the time to contour. For this, I like to use four different blushes. Just under my eye, matching the triangular shape of the concealer I put on earlier, I use the paler color from The Lilac Floral Blush Duo by BH Cosmetics, below that but on top of the cheekbone I use the shimmery Mary-Lou Manizer highlighter by The Balm, and then their Down Boy blush on the sort of apple of the cheek area. To create a shadow under the cheekbone, I use the burgundy Cabana Boy.
 
Do I sound crazy? Perhaps, but look at the results. 
 
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Does that look like the face of madness to you? Maybe, but the face of madness has KILLER cheekbones.

 
After all this, I spritz the whole thing with MAC’s Fix+ Spray which is actually the third secret to non-cakey makeup that lasts forever. It takes the powdery look off makeup instantly and makes everything look more natural. It also has a basically miraculous interaction with Meow Cosmetics mineral powder in that it makes it look like insanely flawless bare skin. You should look like a dewey gorgeous woodland nymph by this step. (You should. I don’t, because I get foundation in my eyebrows and end up looking like a creepy space alien until I color them in.)
 
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But a creepy space alien with STYLE.

 
 
Next we put on everyone’s favorite eyeshadow primer, Urban Decay Primer Potion. Everyone and their grandma loves this stuff for how it prevents creasing, fading and eyeshadow migration. We do this by tapping it on gently with our ring finger.
 
Then we apply cream shadow. Yes I said cream shadow. “In summer?” you demand incredulously, and yes, in summer. See, although we put on primer, I really like to give my eye make-up something to stick to. The trick to dramatic summer makeup is getting it to adhere, and so the more you give your powdery products something to stick to, the better they’ll hold.
 
I love the Maybelline Color Tattoo ones in colors matching the eyeshadow I’m going to be wearing, but I’ve also been known to use MAC Paint Pots or Fluidline. Generally dominatrices go pretty dramatic on the eye makeup. I like to paint my brow bone and tear duct in with Maybelline Too Cool, and then use Mac Blacktrack Fluidline in the deepest part of my crease, winging it out to create a more dramatic effect.
 
On the rest of the lid, and to blend the area between crease and brow bone, I’ll usually use a fun color. Maybelline Inked In Pink is fab under a lot of the pinker tones in the Urban Decay Naked3 palette, and Electric Blues makes a beautiful base for MAC’s Deep Truth. On the brow bone and inner corner of the eye I use Wet N’ Wild’s Sugar shadow and Urban Decay Blackout on the crease. There is no blacker black, and no more perfect sheer, shimmery white. 
 
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This isn’t how it looks when I apply eyeshadow at all, the real thing is a lot more squinty and weird.

 
To get the graphic over the top brow, I love I like to use MAC Fluidline with an angle brush. The result is very dramatic, very black and looks like nothing found in nature. For a vicious, blacker-than-black cat eye I love Stila’s Stay All Day Liner Pen, whamp whamp, just like literally everybody else. Seriously, though it is truly an amazing eyeliner. It’s easy to control, dries quickly and lives up to the “stay all day” promise with no flaking, no smudging, and no fading. (Actually, it’ll stay several days if you don’t soak it off with sweet almond oil like I do.) I love them so much I’ve got about five stashed in my drawer because I’m terrified of ever running out.
 
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If my husband weren’t so pretty I’d also marry this, and I’d be a bigamist.

 
I apply waterproof mascara (I like Australis which is not available stateside, or Maybelline) and two pairs of Ardell false lashes. I’ve worn fancy falsies in my life, but somehow no one ever really beats Ardell for easy of use and wearability. I put one pair on top and a mini pair on bottom. 
 
For my lips, I generally use Stila Stay All Day Liquid Lipstick in Fiery, because what would a dominatrix be without a ruby red pout? The answer is still a dominatrix, which is why if you’re into something gothier, I offer the alternative of Portland Black Lipstick Company's hyper-pigmented lipstick in black.
 
 
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You can use a painted on beauty mark to hide a zit.

 
After all that I throw on a wig if I’m having a bad hair day, and off we go.
 
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I do love a good wig.

 
And that, my ducklings, is how you create a truly sweat-proof, sleep-proof, even kiss-proof (I don’t kiss my clients, ew, but I do kiss my husband while wearing the same stuff) face.