BEAUTY 911: "This Sh*t On My Bottom Smacker Is Not Popping!"

Our very own Helena has a limple.

May 3, 2012 at 4:00pm | Leave a comment

Dear Julie,

My name's Helena, maybe you've heard of me. I'm writing because this shit on my bottom smacker is not popping -- literally or figuratively. I'm not going to speculate on the kinds of activities that are predisposed to giving me these disgusting white heads on my otherwise beautiful big lips because regardless of the fact that I don't always wash my face before bed, the lord shouldn't be punishing me like this. This puss bubble has kept me inside for going on three beautiful spring afternoons and tonight I have to go to this work thing my literary agency is having. Nothing says, "You'll never work in this town again," like a balloon-sized acne bomb on your mouth piece. Can I fix this in 6 hours or will I have to be a Hobbit until it just goes away on it's own?

Yours,

Helena

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Helena's new limple

Helena you crazy kitten, that little nub is nothing! But I understand the pimple politics on lip zits are especially cruel. For the record, I'm in the same boat this week after taking hair removal extremism to the next level and having my whole face threaded.

I read somewhere that ridding the face of that fine layer of fuzz makes for a sharper jawline and more defined features. I learned the hard way, as I usually do with skincare, that full-face threading also yields a full face breakout.

Back to you. There's no way to clear up your lip invader in six hours, but you can certainly treat and cover it. First, examine whether your bump is ready to burst. Is it so fragile that face-washing or towel-drying would puncture the surface? If so, get it popping (the right way), if you must.

Remember when it comes to freeing fluid from a whitehead, start with freshly cleansed skin and ease the puss out of your pimple using clean, tissue-covered index fingers. If this requires anything beyond light pressure, your pimple isn't ready and pushing harder will likely irritate the blemish and leave a red mark. Just back away from the mirror and wait. I know it's difficult.

As someone with scar-prone skin, I would rather live with a hideous puss bubble than pop a pimple and potentially leave a longterm mark. That's just me.

Now, cover-up time. You can dot some concealer on your limple and top with lipstick or gloss, but you risk irritating your blemish and prolonging the healing time. My favorite way to handle a pimple is by leaving it alone and diverting the eyes elsewhere. Since you've got a limple, why not draw attention to your eyes instead or create Face Cleavage? I did this constantly during my worst bout of acne and it works.

What do you do when you have a major pimple? Or even worse, a limple? Help me help Helena!

Follow Julie on Twitter @JR_Schott.