I have no balls. I am sans scrote. Even if I fancied my colleague so hard my boobs lactated Let’s Get It On every time they glanced my way, I still wouldn’t be able to get in a stationery cupboard and go gung-ho on the post-its.
It's called Opposite Bitching (although I need some help to come up with a snappier name). Play a round or two and your soul will feel arier, your karma will be cracking, and, best of all, people will start Opposite Bitching back to you.
When everyone else is busy, it’s all too easy to make lazy onesie-focused decisions because you’ve forgotten that going to the pub, having a proper nice lunch or going to see a film alone is even an option.